The Quest for the Missing Wood Carving

You wanna know how my family spent the half hour before dinner last night?

Trying desperately to finagle a wood carving we'd bought in Nassau out from the bottom of a 10"x 6", 10 foot deep gap in our floor.

The hole is the remnant of a discarded cold-air return vent in our dining room. With the remodel it was re-routed, and only the before mentioned 10" x 6" opening remains. It's covered by a reasonably heavy metal grate, but if you get past that it's a straight but narrow shot straight down into a gap created between the foundation and the newly-installed shower in the basement.

My son - whose Dennis the Menace hijanks have now slipped past cute into anger-inducing - decided over the course of several weeks to dump the statue, numerous utensils, an earring from YaYa's halloween costume, pencils, markers, and God knows what else into this hole.

I spent days searching for that carving and even looked up a reasoable look-a-like online for $49. I was OBSESSED with finding it and until Parker dumped something down the hole in front of me I never thought of the grate - after all, I didn't think he was strong enough to lift it.

So I spot the statue and we start a Baby Jessica rescue party, sans life-threatening situation.

Lisa twisted wire hangars together into a 12 foot pole with a hook on the end (oh, did she hate those dry-cleaning hangars before that - Faye Dunaway style - but didn't they just come in handy?) and started the rescue.

YaYa and I both dismissed the attempt as doomed to fail, and I had visions of having to hack into the shower wall. . .

But she got the dang thing up.

She actually retrieved it. Kudos to her.

And when I showed Parker the carving, hoping for a sign of remorse?

Just a glint in his eyes and a maniacal smile.