I won't keep you long tonight. But a quick anecdote worth remembering.
I was on my way to LuLu's Birthday party with two of my nieces in tow when Lisa asked if I could stop and pick up some last-minute party items from the Dollar Tree. No problem, since it was on the way and features a healthy hardcover book selection.
While I was standing in the book aisle a Mexican guy ran right into me. Normally I'll shrug off an accidental bump or nudge but this was so noticeable I reacted without even thinking.
"What the hell are you doing!?" I said.
"Gun!," he replied. "There's a black guy outside with a gun. He loco [here he twirled his finger against his temple]. He already knock out some windows. Run. Police coming."
Oh for Pete's sake. I was hoping he was full of crap but a quick look to the front of the store showed people running in the parking lot. Inside the store the staff locked the front door and prevented customers from walking outside.
Grand.
I called Lisa.
"Yeah, I'm going to be a little late for the party. There's a guy outside the dollar store with a gun." I said.
"What!? Are you kidding me?" she said.
"No, I'm serious. We're fine but we're stuck inside."
"Did you call the police?" she said a little frantically.
"I didn't think of that. I figured I'd call you first and see how the party was going. Yeah, of course the police are on the way," I said a bit testily.
"Ok, just stay inside. Call me and let me know you're ok," she said.
"Will do. But listen, not to sound like a [bleep] or anything, but the hell with the shopping list. If I see the chance, I'm running for the car," I said.
"Of course! Of course!"
Well, this just sucks, I thought. I'm going to be late for my kids party, I'm responsible for the lives of two children that aren't my own, and the store had zero new books worth reading.
I took the girls into a nook in the back where the restrooms are located .They're rinky dink one toilet affairs with homemade 'out of order' signs permanently taped to the doors. I pulled the 12 year old aside.
"Ok, listen up. If this guy gets into the store I want you to take your sister, go into the restroom, and lock the door. Don't come out until the police or I get you," I said, "Understand?"
"Yes," she said very solemnly.
"Good. Now in the meantime find me a yellow tablecloth and a princess tiara," I said.
There's not much of an ending to this tale, thank God. A few minutes later the cops came and he gave up peacefully, explaining that he'd acted out because he was mad at his parents.
[What an excuse. As I told my Dad later in the day "Big wup. I've mad at you and Mom for 30 years and you don't see me shooting up the dollar store."]
Now I know the guy who bumped into me was telling the truth. After all this we waited in line to buy the tablecloth and tiara, and the store manager told us the guy had knocked out one of their windows and one in the grocery store next door. I saw all the cops in the parking lot, and I overheard one of them as they interviewed the manager.
But . . ..
Granted, when we got out the door (cops or no cops) we sprinted for the car, but I'm danged if I can remember seeing the broken windows - and we're talking the usual, super-size business windows.
Anyway, pretty much a non-story. In the next few days: my nephew's graduation, LuLu's party, Lost's season finale, and reviews of a Robert B Parker book, Salem's Lot, and Flakes.
'Til then :)
