If you want a good laugh, pick up "Emails from an A**hole" by John Lindsay. I made the mistake of reading this at work and laughed until I damn near pis**d my pants. Ah, who are we kidding? I did tinkle. But just a little bit. You could barely even tell. I hope
Published writer, compulsive reader, Old School Whovian, Match Game enthusiast, NKOTB fan, data hoarder, and - surprisingly, given that list - married with four kids. Welcome to my take on life, fatherhood, entertainment, and whatever strikes my fancy. Enjoy!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Would like to borrow, w/ a guaranteed return w/in a week: 1. a copy of "Girl with the Dragon Tattoo' 2. CD of "Middle Cyclone" by Neko Case. 3. Glee soundtracks (someone - cough Anne cough - was supposed to get me a copy, but there ya go) 4. One MILLION dollars. I'll need that last one for more than a week tho'.
If you ever find yourself trapped in my house starving to death, fear not. After emptying the fridge and the pantry, and sacrificing the cats/turtle/fish, just rummage through my couch. Last night I found whole slices of pizza and forgotten bags of Christmas cookies, along with scissors, knives, and several screwdrivers. No, on 2nd thought, try the couch *before* eating my pets.
Madonna + Glee = the best hour of American TV last night. Well done! Unfortunately, the Bowersox love caused AI to run over their time, which in turn cut off the last few minutes of Glee. #%#$ I'm seriously close to ditching AI this season. If I wanted to be bored by folks with bad teeth & dirty hair I'd watch Celebrity Rehab.
Lost - trumped by Glee last night, but still a great hour of TV. PseudoLocke is wrong. Jack is not 'with' him; his refusal to leave the island is clear evidence he's Locke's foe. And it looks like Sayhid may just be redeemed. Unless the rules of fiction writing have changed, he lied when he said he murdered Desmond. The plot thickens.Monday, April 19, 2010
Easter 2010
On Easter morning I was surprised at how much of our training stuck with the kids. Not only did they not venture downstairs until Lisa and I were awake, they made sure they were reasonably attired - knowing full well I'd be snapping photos. :)
Much of their Easter baskets were filled courtesy of a great clearance sale at a craft store. We went there for ?? and instead bumped into a score of $.50 and $1.00 items that were perfect for the kids.
Here's Smiley's
Why scotch tape? Because the kid LOVES tape. Lisa often says he'd marry the stuff if it was legal.
Here's LuLu's:
Ginger's:
And YaYa's basket, and her PopRocks coated tongue:
We then got gussied up and headed out to church, where Ginger was less than perfect (but also less than awful) and then returned home to visit with Lisa's Dad, who dropped off extra baskets for the kids.
Later we all went to my Mom's for dinner, where my kids behaved horrifically. That's what I get for juicing the kids up with sugar and candy and then skipping naptime. Live and learn.
Even so, overall it was a very nice, very sedate Easter. I hope yours went just as well, if not better.
Much of their Easter baskets were filled courtesy of a great clearance sale at a craft store. We went there for ?? and instead bumped into a score of $.50 and $1.00 items that were perfect for the kids.
Here's Smiley's
Why scotch tape? Because the kid LOVES tape. Lisa often says he'd marry the stuff if it was legal.
Here's LuLu's:
Ginger's:
And YaYa's basket, and her PopRocks coated tongue:
We then got gussied up and headed out to church, where Ginger was less than perfect (but also less than awful) and then returned home to visit with Lisa's Dad, who dropped off extra baskets for the kids.
Later we all went to my Mom's for dinner, where my kids behaved horrifically. That's what I get for juicing the kids up with sugar and candy and then skipping naptime. Live and learn.
Even so, overall it was a very nice, very sedate Easter. I hope yours went just as well, if not better.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Irritant #435
You know what (irrationaly) irks me? Ads that say "Reason # 61 Widget is better." I understand you want to give the impression there's a gazillion reasons your product/idea is better, but I dare you, I double dog dare you, to list 60 other reasons - and if you can, why the heck aren't you telling me the #1 reason? Isn't that what I'd most like to hear?
A Dream
For no reason worth noting, here's a dream I had last night. Make of it what you will.
It began with me observing a classroom taught by Samuel L Jackson. He was a marvelous teacher, and praise was rightly heaped on his shoulders. But then, I heard him tell his students that "America Isn't #1. America is nothing." His students nodded in agreement, and I was furious. His students were all on one or more government programs, and while that didn't bother me, the idea of them taking bread with one hand and slapping the baker with the other infuriated me.
Then I was in YaYa and LuLu's room, only the Ginger's crib was back in place. I moved it and there was the usual mess and piles of junk on the floor. Then it began to storm outside, and I went into Smiley's room. His sky light was leaking and I tossed a towel on the floor, but the drip turned into a steady poor as I added more towels. I went to Ginger's room and rain was pouring from a vent in the ceiling.
Then I was downstairs, and it was my house but not my house. It was a huge open space - think a cathedral, minus pews - and running the length of one wall were the stairs to our bedrooms. They were made of stone and ran straight, without landings or turns.
As I walked up the stairs they were wood again, and one of the risers came off in my hands. Now there was a gap, and through that gap I could see far down to the floor below. The staircase shifted, and I noticed it was no longer flush with the wall to my right. There were inches or more of space between the wall and the stairs, and a yard or more between the missing riser and the next stair.
I got it into my head that I could shift the entire staircase to the right and slam it up against the wall, fixing the problem. I did so - it moved like a rolling staircase you see employees use at Home Depot - but the gap at the top grew larger.
Now I was worried. There was no way we could jump that gap, and our bedrooms and the second floor were useless to us.
And that's it - I woke up.
It began with me observing a classroom taught by Samuel L Jackson. He was a marvelous teacher, and praise was rightly heaped on his shoulders. But then, I heard him tell his students that "America Isn't #1. America is nothing." His students nodded in agreement, and I was furious. His students were all on one or more government programs, and while that didn't bother me, the idea of them taking bread with one hand and slapping the baker with the other infuriated me.
Then I was in YaYa and LuLu's room, only the Ginger's crib was back in place. I moved it and there was the usual mess and piles of junk on the floor. Then it began to storm outside, and I went into Smiley's room. His sky light was leaking and I tossed a towel on the floor, but the drip turned into a steady poor as I added more towels. I went to Ginger's room and rain was pouring from a vent in the ceiling.
Then I was downstairs, and it was my house but not my house. It was a huge open space - think a cathedral, minus pews - and running the length of one wall were the stairs to our bedrooms. They were made of stone and ran straight, without landings or turns.
As I walked up the stairs they were wood again, and one of the risers came off in my hands. Now there was a gap, and through that gap I could see far down to the floor below. The staircase shifted, and I noticed it was no longer flush with the wall to my right. There were inches or more of space between the wall and the stairs, and a yard or more between the missing riser and the next stair.
I got it into my head that I could shift the entire staircase to the right and slam it up against the wall, fixing the problem. I did so - it moved like a rolling staircase you see employees use at Home Depot - but the gap at the top grew larger.
Now I was worried. There was no way we could jump that gap, and our bedrooms and the second floor were useless to us.
And that's it - I woke up.
Facebooking the tail end of February
Crowded house. All the kids are home now, plus Lisa's watching Jess & Jason's newborn and a 3 yr old while they move. My my. Good thing (for me) that I'm leaving for work soon. ;)
* Apparently I can't count. There was an extra six year old, 3 year old, and newborn in the house - 7 kids total.
Good Riddance - Man gets 80 years for shooting 2 Milwaukee police officers
* AI was dull & unimpressive, and I'm really not liking the dynamic between the judges. Kara remains an awkward fit; too ADD, too much makeup, too unable to define her role on the panel. Although he was bad, they were waaaay too hard on Tim Urban, especially when they let equally sucky peformers off the hook. Kudos to E...llen for (gently) calling Kara and Randy out for how they acted during Casey James' perfromance. Who goes home? The Asian singer (sorry, I really don't remember his name) and just about any one of 6 or 7 of the others. Yikes - not a good start to the live shows.
* A great surprise on our DVR tonight: On Rupaul's Drag Race they (gasp! applause) did a full-out recreation of The Match Game, cleverly re-titled "The S*atch Game". Sure everyone was in drag and impersonating a celebrity, and they had too many people on each tier for a traditionalist like myself - but Gene Rayburn & Co.... would've had a blast. Plus Tatianna won, so it was a great hour of TV all around.
Lisa wrote: I just couldn't believe my eyes, it was an episode just for you!
Feb 26th:
* My niece's 2nd grd teacher (she's in 3rd now) was fired today. She'd begun to show signs of mental illness, writing things like "20+20+10" on the board and saying it equaled 30. Other teachers started to shun her. On the way to a staff outing she went back to her rm for her purse & returned to find everyone had left w/...out her. I guess there's so little pain in the world they felt they had to add to it. A*holes.
* I was a little suprised at the AI eliminations. Janell deserved her fate ( but she was hot, wasn't she?) but Ashley Rodriguez should have been safe (even if she is overanimated on stage). Guys; America obviously flipped the judges the bird for their bashing of Tim Urban. 4 all the talk about how good he was was I co...uldn't understand 1/2 of Joe Muñoz's song - so no qualms about him leaving. Tyler was a shock tho'.
* The secret ingredient . . . is phone.
* Sentry (at least the one in Bay View) no longer accepts Internet coupons, rendering many popular sites useless. I'm told they were burned on a Velvetta forgery (snort). So, for the sake of a lost 40 cents here and there, they have turned the clock back to 1963 and pushed more biz to the Evil Empire that is Pic 'n Save. Nice.
*"Democrats quietly vote to reauthorize legislation [Patriot Act] many decried under Bush.". No new privacy provisions were added and all the tenets of Dubya's policies were renewed. Kudos -it's the right thing to do. That said, its yet another example of how Dems preach one thing on the campagin trail and do another while in office
* Gwen Moore, our (hopefully) soon to be ex-Congresswoman, earns a 1 on the liberal scale based on roll-call votes on economic, social and foreign-policy. Her conservative score was 423. 'Liberal' Russ Feingold, OTOH, earned a relatively balanced 55 liberal and 44 conservative score.
* RE Carly Simon disclosing the origin of "You're So Vain": And the winner is . . . David Geffen.
* (on a Milwaukee Pot dealer getting 6 years in prison) To put this in perspective, we just saw that a killer got a cushy *12* year sentence for stangling a guy with a garrotte and ditching the body. Of course, if he'd killed him with a joint in his pocket he might have got life. What a world.
Feb 27th:
Got off work at 11 to find my friend Erv was in town. As a surprise he brought us a DVD player to replace the one that went on the fritz the last time he visited (thanks!). We hung out until half an hour ago. Pretty damn tired at this point, since I've been up since 7, so later folks. 'Night
* Payday + a new DVD player = the purchase of "Coming Home", NKOTB's new DVD of their 2008/2009 tour.
* I'm reading Shutter Island, in lieu of having the $ or babysitters to see the film. It's very good so far, although I'm worred that I've guessed the ending. Also read so far this year: Horns by Joe Hill, The Andromeda Strain by Michael Crichton, The 1st Rule by Robert Crais, and Final Target by Steve Gore.
* [on the suicide of Marie Osmond's son] Oh man, that's awful news. My thoughts are with their family.
We just finished watching "Couples Retreat". C+ seems to be the consensus grade here.
Feb 28th:
? for everyone: strictly for $ reasons, we're looking to switch from cable to Dish (not Direct TV), but I don't want to sacrifice reliability or quality. For anyone in the know: how reliable is the signal? Is the system easy to use? Is the DVR up to snuff and easy to navigate? How good is the company itself? Your thoughts on the matter?
Massive head of pharaoh unearthed in Egypt
Till death did them part, only death did not A great story. Although he had a lot to work with here, Jim Stingl is consistently one of the best reads in the Journal.
* [Olympic figure skater]Johnny Weir can dress and act however he likes. It's his right and it doesn't bother me. But his quote "I think masculinity is what you believe it to be." is goofy. Acutally, it's uh, pretty much a definable characteristic there bub. And wearing a pink see-through ensemble is *not* masculine.
* The book this blog post references (God's Battalions by Rodney Stark) is a great read. I finished it in the fall of '09. It's a historically accurate retort to the common fallacies people toss around about the Crusades (aka everything the modern world ever utters about them). I recommend the book for anyone more interested in historical truth than anti-Western, anti-Chritian myth.
* [on the NFL's plans to rework OT rules] Good, I think the NFL's OT rules are beyond dumb. That said, they often work to reveal to Favre as a choker, so I'd miss that . . .
* [watching US-Canada vie for Gold in Olympic hockey] Whoo-hoo! A tying goal with 24.4 seconds left! Did you see the heartbreak on the faces of that Canadian crowd? The quiet in that arena was priceless! On to OT . . .
Well damn, the wrong anthem will be playing in Vancouver. Still, a helluva game and one for the ages.
Special congrats to Joe Pavelski, Phil Kessel, Danny Heatly, Ryan Suter, and Brian Rafalski... all members of the Men's US Hockey team that were either born in, or have ties to Wisconsin.
* The great coffee experiment is over. I came home to find my coffe pot shattered on the floor and coffee grounds all over the wall, courtesy of Ginger. I am soooo . . . not in a good place today.
Lisa wrote: You didn't "find" it, like I left it for you...it happened 10 seconds before you walked in the door while your mom phoned simultaneously. I'm sorry it happened. I do however think it's funny you describe how you are today as "not in a good place", I'd describe it as on a warpath, lol.
* I'm four "chapters" into 'Inglorious Basterds' and I'm bored to point of anger. Yak Yak and f*ing yak some more. That bar scene went on for HOURS. Indulgent crap from Tarantino, IMO. Let's see if the rest of the film rescues this turkey. Nope, it didn't.
* Apparently I can't count. There was an extra six year old, 3 year old, and newborn in the house - 7 kids total.
Good Riddance - Man gets 80 years for shooting 2 Milwaukee police officers
* AI was dull & unimpressive, and I'm really not liking the dynamic between the judges. Kara remains an awkward fit; too ADD, too much makeup, too unable to define her role on the panel. Although he was bad, they were waaaay too hard on Tim Urban, especially when they let equally sucky peformers off the hook. Kudos to E...llen for (gently) calling Kara and Randy out for how they acted during Casey James' perfromance. Who goes home? The Asian singer (sorry, I really don't remember his name) and just about any one of 6 or 7 of the others. Yikes - not a good start to the live shows.
* A great surprise on our DVR tonight: On Rupaul's Drag Race they (gasp! applause) did a full-out recreation of The Match Game, cleverly re-titled "The S*atch Game". Sure everyone was in drag and impersonating a celebrity, and they had too many people on each tier for a traditionalist like myself - but Gene Rayburn & Co.... would've had a blast. Plus Tatianna won, so it was a great hour of TV all around.
Lisa wrote: I just couldn't believe my eyes, it was an episode just for you!
Feb 26th:
* My niece's 2nd grd teacher (she's in 3rd now) was fired today. She'd begun to show signs of mental illness, writing things like "20+20+10" on the board and saying it equaled 30. Other teachers started to shun her. On the way to a staff outing she went back to her rm for her purse & returned to find everyone had left w/...out her. I guess there's so little pain in the world they felt they had to add to it. A*holes.
* I was a little suprised at the AI eliminations. Janell deserved her fate ( but she was hot, wasn't she?) but Ashley Rodriguez should have been safe (even if she is overanimated on stage). Guys; America obviously flipped the judges the bird for their bashing of Tim Urban. 4 all the talk about how good he was was I co...uldn't understand 1/2 of Joe Muñoz's song - so no qualms about him leaving. Tyler was a shock tho'.
* The secret ingredient . . . is phone.
* Sentry (at least the one in Bay View) no longer accepts Internet coupons, rendering many popular sites useless. I'm told they were burned on a Velvetta forgery (snort). So, for the sake of a lost 40 cents here and there, they have turned the clock back to 1963 and pushed more biz to the Evil Empire that is Pic 'n Save. Nice.
*"Democrats quietly vote to reauthorize legislation [Patriot Act] many decried under Bush.". No new privacy provisions were added and all the tenets of Dubya's policies were renewed. Kudos -it's the right thing to do. That said, its yet another example of how Dems preach one thing on the campagin trail and do another while in office
* Gwen Moore, our (hopefully) soon to be ex-Congresswoman, earns a 1 on the liberal scale based on roll-call votes on economic, social and foreign-policy. Her conservative score was 423. 'Liberal' Russ Feingold, OTOH, earned a relatively balanced 55 liberal and 44 conservative score.
* RE Carly Simon disclosing the origin of "You're So Vain": And the winner is . . . David Geffen.
* (on a Milwaukee Pot dealer getting 6 years in prison) To put this in perspective, we just saw that a killer got a cushy *12* year sentence for stangling a guy with a garrotte and ditching the body. Of course, if he'd killed him with a joint in his pocket he might have got life. What a world.
Feb 27th:
Got off work at 11 to find my friend Erv was in town. As a surprise he brought us a DVD player to replace the one that went on the fritz the last time he visited (thanks!). We hung out until half an hour ago. Pretty damn tired at this point, since I've been up since 7, so later folks. 'Night
* Payday + a new DVD player = the purchase of "Coming Home", NKOTB's new DVD of their 2008/2009 tour.
* I'm reading Shutter Island, in lieu of having the $ or babysitters to see the film. It's very good so far, although I'm worred that I've guessed the ending. Also read so far this year: Horns by Joe Hill, The Andromeda Strain by Michael Crichton, The 1st Rule by Robert Crais, and Final Target by Steve Gore.
* [on the suicide of Marie Osmond's son] Oh man, that's awful news. My thoughts are with their family.
We just finished watching "Couples Retreat". C+ seems to be the consensus grade here.
Feb 28th:
? for everyone: strictly for $ reasons, we're looking to switch from cable to Dish (not Direct TV), but I don't want to sacrifice reliability or quality. For anyone in the know: how reliable is the signal? Is the system easy to use? Is the DVR up to snuff and easy to navigate? How good is the company itself? Your thoughts on the matter?
Massive head of pharaoh unearthed in Egypt
Till death did them part, only death did not A great story. Although he had a lot to work with here, Jim Stingl is consistently one of the best reads in the Journal.
* [Olympic figure skater]Johnny Weir can dress and act however he likes. It's his right and it doesn't bother me. But his quote "I think masculinity is what you believe it to be." is goofy. Acutally, it's uh, pretty much a definable characteristic there bub. And wearing a pink see-through ensemble is *not* masculine.
* The book this blog post references (God's Battalions by Rodney Stark) is a great read. I finished it in the fall of '09. It's a historically accurate retort to the common fallacies people toss around about the Crusades (aka everything the modern world ever utters about them). I recommend the book for anyone more interested in historical truth than anti-Western, anti-Chritian myth.
* [on the NFL's plans to rework OT rules] Good, I think the NFL's OT rules are beyond dumb. That said, they often work to reveal to Favre as a choker, so I'd miss that . . .
* [watching US-Canada vie for Gold in Olympic hockey] Whoo-hoo! A tying goal with 24.4 seconds left! Did you see the heartbreak on the faces of that Canadian crowd? The quiet in that arena was priceless! On to OT . . .
Well damn, the wrong anthem will be playing in Vancouver. Still, a helluva game and one for the ages.
Special congrats to Joe Pavelski, Phil Kessel, Danny Heatly, Ryan Suter, and Brian Rafalski... all members of the Men's US Hockey team that were either born in, or have ties to Wisconsin.
* The great coffee experiment is over. I came home to find my coffe pot shattered on the floor and coffee grounds all over the wall, courtesy of Ginger. I am soooo . . . not in a good place today.
Lisa wrote: You didn't "find" it, like I left it for you...it happened 10 seconds before you walked in the door while your mom phoned simultaneously. I'm sorry it happened. I do however think it's funny you describe how you are today as "not in a good place", I'd describe it as on a warpath, lol.
* I'm four "chapters" into 'Inglorious Basterds' and I'm bored to point of anger. Yak Yak and f*ing yak some more. That bar scene went on for HOURS. Indulgent crap from Tarantino, IMO. Let's see if the rest of the film rescues this turkey. Nope, it didn't.
Saturday, April 17, 2010
My initial take on Matt Smith's Doctor
The verdict on Matt Smith's Doctor? He's no Tennant - let's make that clear - but he is well and truly The Doctor. I'm going to like this kid. Moffat's script was strong, there were some great lines, and new companion Amelia (Amy) Pond is surprisingly hot; think Leela but with red hair and wearing a policewoman uniform. It's going to be a great season.
A new Doctor!
Less than one hour until the U.S. premiere of Matt Smith's debut as the Doctor - followed by an all new hour of Graham Norton! [dabbing tears of joys from my eyes]. 'Tis a wonderful world, innit?
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