James Gandolfini

My heart is aching. RIP the great James Gandolfini, age 51. Tony, you will be missed 🙁

Vince Flynn

RIP bestselling thriller author Vince Flynn, age 47

Junie's Graduation

June 6th was Junie's graduation from K5 to 1st grade, an event celebrated fondly for each of our kids. This year's event resulted in a fair amount of turmoil, but I will keep that out of this post and simply stick to the bright shiny parts :)

Here's the girl on her big day:

Here are water bottles Lisa customized for the event. She designed and ordered the labels off of Ebay, affixed them, and then decorated them with a ribbon in the school colors. 

Here are Smarties candies that Lisa rolled in paper marked "2013", tied with ribbon and sent in as "diplomas" for the snack table. 

Here's Junie again. 

The big moment arrives: 

A proud grad!

Afterwards we lunched at the Nite Owl. 

Congratulations Junie! We are proud of you and will love you forever!

Fantasy Baseball

The text I posted on my fantasy baseball league's page, protesting a trade-in-progress: "So you're in last place, but you give the guy in 1st a) Hardy, who's on pace for 26 HR and 80 RBI, along with b) a pitcher due to come off the DL next week, in exchange for Tulo, who's out for 4 to 6 weeks. The season runs for *7* more weeks. Are we in a keeper league? Cuz short of that, I'm thinking someone's on the grassy knoll."

Jogging - Day 3

Day 3 of jogging is under my belt. Went out with a reluctant Grace today and set a much faster pace. 80% jogging, 20% walking. Damn near killed my calves. It's not torture, but I'd much rather be riding a bike. Or watching TV. Either/or.

Jack Reacher

I rented "Jack Reacher" today, the first movie I've watched in five or six weeks. Based on the great books by Lee Child, I was initially put out by watching Tom Cruise in the title role. In the books Reacher is around 6'5 and built like a tank, and Cruise is what, 5'6"? In the end I was a convert. Cruise carried off the role, and while the movie was a bit long I enoyed it a lot. GREAT car chase btw.

A Plea

A plea: sad to say, but after pulling the bikes out for the summer all four kids have either outgrown their bikes or need repairs that aren't worth the cost. The thought of paying full price for four new bikes right now . . . well, it ain't happening, and I''ll never see - or desire - a handout from kin. If you have any bikes available for a 12ish, 10, and 6ish girl or an 8 year old boy and are willing to part with them for a song, please comment here and (then) text me. Thank you!

More Jogging

Went jogging again today, this time with Smiley and Junie. Still horrendous, although the running was a little less so and the company much more irritating. Can we stop and pet the cat? Who lives there? Why we have to stop to breathe? Should we call 911? Bah - give me LuLu's quiet embarrassment any day.

Thursday (June 13th) was a good day for Team Slap.

Thursday  (June 13^th) was a good day for Team Slap.

It didn’t start out that way, as befits any good tale – where’s the drama in perfection? At the last moment I checked my calendar and found that LuLu and Smiley had a dentist appointment at 9 a.m.  Oops. That was bad enough, but it turns out I was wrong about the time, and we sat in the waiting room for an unnecessary half hour.

Both kids were there to have cavities fixed, and LuLu went first. Within a few minutes the dentist called back to the exam room, where Lu was steadfastly refusing to open her mouth claiming (and this was the first I’d heard of it) a fear of needles. After briefly resuming the argument the dentist gave up and recommended I take her to a specialist in pediatric dentistry.

Since I can’t afford this, I wooed Lu and convinced her to continue. She reneged on her agreement,  and was promptly removed to the waiting room. Smiley then went in and conducted his business with unflappable English resignation, although I credit this simply to wanting to show up his sister, as he is normally quite afraid of the dentist.

Lisa later expressed her dissatisfaction with my failure to convince Lu.

Lunch and a nap followed, and then we gathered outside to take our bikes out of their winter quarters in the shed. The news wasn’t good. Of the six bikes we have for five of us (mine was stolen last June), one had had  a bad chain, two had cracked tires that wouldn’t hold air, one had a front tire that was loose and later found to be leaking air, and the sixth was too small for anyone.

I fixed up the small bike by raising the seat and handlebars so at the very least Junie could ride it around the alley, but it won’t do long term. I fixed the loose wheel and tinkered with the others, but all in all it’s a shambles, and I don’t know where I’ll find the money to fix or replace them all.

Here comes the good news though.

Last week, when I took the mower Lisa bought me for Father’s Day 2012 out of storage, it refused to start.  I was told I’d gummed up the carburetor by failing to remove the gas over the winter, which in my ignorance I had no clue was necessary. Lacking the funds to fix it right now, I made do with the awful rotor mower I inherited from my Big Grandpa.  On a lark I tried the power mower again yesterday, and it started! Oh, it belched black smoke for awhile, but it came to life with vigor and I mowed the lawn, then, feeling inspired, took out the trimmer and finished the job.

Hot dog!

Then even bigger news – Smiley learned to ride a bike!

Lu took him out to the alley and had him practice on one of the bikes, and like the Mother Hen she is she was calm and collected as she instructed him. Then, to our surprise, she let go and he rode down the alley. Lisa and I both let our a roar and threw our arms in the air! We’ve been trying for two years to teach the boy, and he’s always been too squeamish to master it, which was directly at odds with Lisa’s insistence that bike riding is a prerequisite for childhood. Again – hot dog!

Feeling all warm and family-ish, I grabbed our mitts and headed to the alley for a game of catch with Smiley. Lisa joined us for awhile, and soon Junie had designated herself as the ball girl, running after each missed ball as it traveled down the alley, which relieved me of the worst part of catch. Lisa then went and played some volleyball with Lu, but once I heard the kid start to whine I knew it was time to pack it in and go inside.

After a quick but improvised dinner Lisa and I cuddled on the couch and watched Dateline.

To finish off the night, while in the car the radio provided me with perfect driving music: Nine Inch Nails, GNR, Black Sabbath, Van Halen (Hagar),  ABBA and One Direction.

All in all, a great day J

Jogging

I went jogging for the first time in my life today. It wasn't pretty, but Olivia and I covered a little more than a mile, alternating jogging/walking every other block. Will I do it again? Well, I didn't *die*, which was a good thing, but that's all I can say for it at this point :)

How Sweet is Smiley?

This first one isn't actually Smiley's work, or evidence of his sweetness, but rather a quick monogram I made for him on the paper tablecloth of a pizza restaurant. I rather like it, and so did he. 

Here's a homemade card he gave Lisa for Mother's Day: 

I will love you even wine [sic] I die. Happy Mom's day. I love you. 

Lastly, here is a giraffe made of clothespins that he gave to me as a gift after spending the weekend with his maternal grandmother. He was very eager to present it to me, and was quite proud when I displayed it prominently in my bedroom. 

The Russia House by John LeCarre

Last night I finished reading my first book in almost two months. It was "Russia House" by John Le Carre, and while it was my first taste of the master storyteller, it won't be the last.

Do Better [Blank] Bank

A scare yesterday: we got certified mail saying we were in default of our mortgage (we're not). When I called and pointed out that our payments were up to date they said I'd missed May, which then meant June's wouldn't be accepted until I paid up. Funny that, since they cashed my check. The mystery was solved when, while on the phone, I pulled up a copy of the payment on my bank's website - and noticed the wrong account number was printed on it. The clerk at the bank that holds the mortgage had credited it to the wrong account. After a good 40 minute phone call, the problem was resolved. But c'mon people . . .

Joan Parker

RIP Joan Parker, beloved wife and muse of Robert B Parker. 🙁

My Thoughts

stupid analogies are stupid

Truman

• Early in the year I read both volumes of Harry Truman's autobiography and, to be honest, I had a hard time of it; popular opinion aside, there just didn't seem that much to like about him. Here are some thoughts I posted on social media at the time. I'm not sure why the formatting is so screwy, but I can't seem to fix it. 
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• There are few things more obnoxious than a "self-taught" man constantly showing off his knowledge - often knowledge half-understood and in the wrong context - in a vain effort to ease his inferiority complex. Harry S Truman, I'm talking to you.
• 
  
• Reading V2 of Truman's memoirs. Every time I'm impressed, he follows it up with something jack-assery.
• Hyper partisan. Distrustful of 'experts'. Twists history 2 justify his decisions. Ever hungry 4 more gov't. What's not to luv about Truman?
• Chp. 26 of his memoirs concern the a-bomb, and HST is far too cavalier about it. re Hirishima: " This is the greatest thing in history" ?!?!
• Truman argued the Potsdam declaration was
•  fair warning of & justification for the atomic destruction to come. I call b.s.
• In Chapter 26 of Vol 1 of his memoirs he admits he had been advised by statesmen and 
• 
  
• military alike that taking the Emperor off the table – in effect, making “unconditional 
• 
  
• surrender” slightly less so – would all but ensure the surrender of Japan. He concurred, and
• 
  
•  in an awkward segue claims that Potsdam was his last, best attempt to offer the Japanese a 
• 
  
• way out under that umbrella. But if you read the declaration, there is no mention of such a concession, nor for obvious reasons is there mention of atomic weapons, merely the standard issue “surrender or we’ll destroy you”. and, as you know, we did amend our surrender demands to allow the Emperror to remain - after we dropped two bombs.There may have been a way out, and it was either squandered or subverted by the President. 
• 
  
• Whether or not its use was justified - and I lean towards 'yes’ for Hiroshima, but no for Nagasaki – and whether by the same token you can stomach the idea of consciously selecting an entire population center for extermination - one would hope you make the decision with careful deliberation and a ton of melancholy. Not so. At least as he wrote it, the decision was preordained, and he was at sea when the bomb was dropped. He then famously declared the news of Hiroshima’s fate to be “the greatest thing in history” and expresses no hesitation when needlessly bombing Nagasaki three days latei. 
• 
  
• Throughout the chapter its taken far, far less somberly than prior discussions over the partitioning of Germany and the division of the German merchant fleet. Even if he didn't give one fat fig about dropping the bomb, a proper respect for the opinions of mankind and mankind’s God decrees that some expression of remorse or solemnity find its way into his account
• 
  
• There is none.
• Whether or not its use was justified - and I lean towards 'yes’ for Hiroshima, but no for Nagasaki – and whether by the same token you can stomach the idea of consciously selecting an entire population center for extermination - one would hope you make the decision with careful deliberation and a ton of melancholy. Not so. At least as he wrote it, the decision was preordained, and he was at sea when the bomb was dropped. He then famously declared the news of Hiroshima’s fate to be “the greatest thing in history” and expresses no hesitation when needlessly bombing Nagasaki three days latei. 
• 
  
• Throughout the chapter its taken far, far less somberly than prior discussions over the partitioning of Germany and the division of the German merchant fleet. Even if he didn't give one fat fig about dropping the bomb, a proper respect for the opinions of mankind and mankind’s God decrees that some expression of remorse or solemnity find its way into his account
• 
  
• There is none.
• Whether or not its use was justified - and I lean towards 'yes’ for Hiroshima, but no for Nagasaki – and whether by the same token you can stomach the idea of consciously selecting an entire population center for extermination - one would hope you make the decision with careful deliberation and a ton of melancholy. Not so. At least as he wrote it, the decision was preordained, and he was at sea when the bomb was dropped. He then famously declared the news of Hiroshima’s fate to be “the greatest thing in history” and expresses no hesitation when needlessly bombing Nagasaki three days latei. 
• Throughout the chapter its taken far, far less somberly than prior discussions over the partitioning of Germany and the division of the German merchant fleet. Even if he didn't give one fat fig about dropping the bomb, a proper respect for the opinions of mankind and mankind’s God decrees that some expression of remorse or solemnity find its way into his account
• 
  
• There is none.
• Throughout the chapter its taken far, far less somberly than prior discussions over the partitioning of Germany and the division of the German merchant fleet. Even if he didn't give one fat fig about dropping the bomb, a proper respect for the opinions of mankind and mankind’s God decrees that some expression of remorse or solemnity find its way into his account
• There is none.
• There is none.
• I would counter that paragraph one of my comment is not a question of morality per se ( though it is as well) but of practicality. Had we not had the bomb, the failure to amend the " unconditional" surrender despite correct pleas to do so would have had us incur needless economic, material, and personnel losses by dragging out the war. Offer that and have it refused, and you remove any moral questions regarding the use of the bomb.
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1. 
   

Where's the fun in that?

Last week a friend treated us to pizza at the restaurant down the street. YaYa stayed behind but asked that we return with three slices for her dinner.

We complied, but as a joke also brought home three teeny tiny slices just to freak her out.

Alas, aware of my humor she blandly played along, accepting the offering without complaint and thanking us for a tasty dinner.

Where's the fun in that?

Quote of the Day

“All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.” 

- Will Rogers

More of YaYa's Art - "Sophia's Back 6-2-13"

LK and my Mom

Custard at Leon's after Mass

Yes, I took Junie to church wearing a "Vampires Suck" T-shirt. Sue me - at least we went, right? 

LBJ

LEBRON!

Fantasy Baseball

Lost the first three weeks of the fantasy baseball season. Won the next five weeks. Lost last week. Tied this time around. Top to bottom, a helluva lot more fun than fantasy football.

Chuckles Bites the Dust

Just watched the classic Mary Tyler Moore Show episode "Chuckles Bites the Dust" (S6ep7), often ranked as the best half-hour sitcom episode of all time. 38 years after it aired, it still made me LOL.

:(

Crap day. Absolutely crap day.