Shawshank, Expendables 2, and Bernie

A co-workerof mine loaned me a copy of The Shawshank Redemption months ago, and I dilly-dallied and avoided watching it until just recently. That was an error, as to my mind it’s the movie that should have won Best Picture in 1994, not Forrest Gump.

There’s not much to say that hasn’t already been said about this movie, since it’s already moved into the ‘near classic’ category. Morgan Freeman was superb, the script was excellent, Tim Robbins was very good (but not up to Freeman’s level), and so on.  I liked it start to finish, ‘cepting that saccharine, overly sentimental scene where the power of music moves the soul of every hard core rapist and murderer in the prison.

Grade: an easy A+

Bernie , which is based on a true story, is a dark comedy starring Jack Black as the titular character. Bernie is a soft-spoken, much beloved funeral director who gets involved with the wrong crowd in his Texas town; the ‘wrong crowd’ being a cranky old widow played by Shriley MacClaine. When Bernie has had enough and kills her in fit of anger his role as town hero should be over – but lo and behold it’s just begun.

Black was excellent in the movie, and as Lisa pointed out I doubt he had to be convinced to star in another movie that lets him sing and dance and act the fool. The story was solid, the characters convincing, and the cast strong. There’s not a lot more to ask for in a film.

Grade:  A

The Expendables 2, unless I'm way off, was not intended to expand our appreciation of film as an artistic expression of the human soul. Good thing that, because this is a ridiculous, over-the-top film with a view of warfare and violence culled straight out of the mind of a 10 year old boy. 

It was also a lot of fun. 

Kudos to Chuck Norris for his cameo, but I was happiest when Arnold was in on the action. It's good to see the Guvenator back where he belongs, on the big screen. 

Grade: B 

No Censorship Please

A parent at my kids school was/is trying to have pop music banned from school events because it isn't "Christian". With respect, phooey. I stated my objection politely but firmly, and now I find the post has been removed. That, almost as much as the objectionable suggestion, is pi**ing me off.

Congrats

Congrats to the Packers on their NFC North Championship!

In Which GusGus and Angel attempt a Breakout

Both cats object to the brand of cat food I bought recently and have turned feral, trying to grab table scraps and on lieu of that going on a hunger strike. Fine with me, ya picky buggers. BUT, they both bolted out the back door today and ran off. I found Angelcakes in the backyard but GusGus wandered into the neighbors yard. I had to corral him for a bit, and when it came down to it here was the pivotal moment: 

I was behind the shed alongside the porch when he appeared again on our porch. 

Seeing me he was ready to bolt, and so I acted immediately, vaulting up and over the side of the porch in a feat of athletic derring-do that I would judge impossible for a man my size. GusGus seemed equally stunned, and I got the $^#@  in my arms and back inside. Unfortunately, now every muscle in my body - all 8 of them - ache. 

And yes, I surrendered and bought them their normal fare.

My 100th Book of the Year!!! Whoo-Hoo!

For my epic 100th book of the year – the culmination of a goal established 18 years ago – I wanted something with a bit of intellectual heft, something worthy of the iconic spot. I killed two birds with one stone by selecting a book that has sat on my shelf since about the time I set that goal; Concerning Dissent and Civil Disobedience by Supreme Court Justice Abe Fortas. Written in 1968, during the height of Vietnam, urban riots, and social upheaval, the book seeks to define the “limits and the scope of permissible dissent and civil disobedience” in America.

Fortas promotes a liberal philosophy but one tempered with a respect for this nation and the institutional framework of democracy. Various arguments, such as those related to the draft, are no longer pertinent (though powerful) and at one point I vividly remember him writing that he can’t imagine anyone ever arguing that flag burning would be considered  freedom of speech – a psychic he was not.

But there are a lot of reasoned, valid points in the book, all delivered without any lawyer speak.

“A citizen cannot demand of his government or of other people obedience to the law, and at the same time claim a right in himself to break it by lawless conduct, free of punishment or penalty. He cannot substitute his own judgment or passion, however noble, for the rules of law”.

“ . . . In a social revolution the demands for action, for cure, for restitution, for reparation, are not easily met. The demand is not satisfied by the initial or moderate response. It is fed by it. The vigor and fervor of the demand increase as its justice is admitted and some steps are taken to meet it. As demand outstrips the early response, attitudes on both sides harden. Frustration sets in. Those demanding change see no prospect of satisfaction; those who initially offered reform despair of a reasonable resolution. And so, conflict and crisis occur.”

“Dissent and dissenters have no monopoly on freedom. They must tolerate opposition. They must accept dissent from their dissent . . . they must give it the respect and latitude which they claim for themselves. Neither youth nor virtue can justify the disregard of this principle.”

“In my judgment, civil disobedience – the deliberate violation of law – is never justified in our nation where the law being violated is not itself the focus or target of the protest.[emphasis mine] . . Civil disobedience is a violation of law. Any violation of law must be punished, whatever its purpose, as the theory of civil disobedience recognizes. But law violation directed  . . . to unrelated laws which are disobeyed merely to dramatize dissent, may be morally as well as politically unacceptable.”

“good motives do not excuse action which will injure others. The individual’s conscience does not give him a license to indulge individual conviction without regard to the rights of others.”

There are other points worth reading, and if there’s a copy in your local library I encourage you read this relatively short treatise. I grade this an “A”.

Our Evening

Making jambalaya for dinner while the kids watch the umpteenth episode of The Nanny - LuLu in particular is obsessed with the sitcom (and I do rank it one of the unheralded gems of the '90's)

Awful Awful Events in the News

20 elementary schoolchildren dead in Connecticut, 22 children stabbed in a separate attack in China . . . what a lousy world. Prayers for all those hurt by the tragedies. Part of me is hoping the Mayans are right, and that we're all off the hook in less than ten days.

Three Cheesy Horror Films

Isolation is a horror film starring David Harbour as the bad guy and Eva Amurri as his initially oblivious victim. I’m tempted to reveal much of the plot, as you should be able to guess it within minutes of starting the film, but I’ll follow social norms and avoid spoilers. A woman wakes up in an isolation ward in a hospital, slowly realizes all is not right, and then discovers her doctor has a personal, bloody vendetta against her.  And the fun begins . . .

Lisa liked the movie, so it must have some redeeming qualities, and I didn't hate it; I've certainly seen worse. But there wasn't much to love. Amurri gave an emotionally empty  performance, which immediately left the film stuck in neutral, and as I implied the plot wasn't exactly stockpiling original thoughts.  Worst of all, to my mind, was the motivation behind the bad guy’s actions.  Oh, once you hear it you’ll know the writer wanted you to empathize with the guy’s rage, but if you’re a thinking, feeling grown-up you’ll immediately write it off as misplaced, exaggerated horse hockey. 

I grade this one a C-

The Apparition is a horror film starring Ashley Greene, who I understand plays a part in the Twilight movies that, by the grace of a loving God, I hope  I will never ever have to watch. What is The Apparition about, you say?

Answer: I don’t know.

Yes, I watched the film, but it was such a magnificently shoddy movie that it soon became white noise in the background while I moved on to more entertaining things, like cleaning that gunk out from beneath the nail of my big toe.

As near as I can tell, some demon or spirit is after the heroes, and chooses to manifest itself in the form of black fungus. In fact, I’m not sure I’m sold on the idea it was a ghost – maybe the house just had a mold issue.

Grade: F

I have a longstanding rule against watching so called ‘torture porn’ like Hostel, but I seem to have broken that by streaming Spiderhole. In the film four college students decide to forego pesky items like rent and utility bills by breaking into an abandoned house and claiming squatter’s rights. Alas, the home isn’t quite as unoccupied as they believe, and they are soon introduced to a man in the basement with an unhealthy interest in amateur dentistry.  And amputation, and  . .

.  

First things first: I thought Amy Noble was adorable, but I’m a sucker for a woman with a short, sassy hairstyle.

Second, for some odd reason the film works. I remember about half an hour into it Lisa turned to me and complimented it, and to my surprise I agreed with her. For at least the first half of the movie there’s something about it, some magic bullet that I still can’t seem to articulate, that lifts this up from ‘standard slasher fare’ to ‘reasonably well made film  done by people who actually seem to give a sh*t’. Maybe that’s the potion right there; the mere act of creative passion elevating something above its visible worth.

Truthfully, I wouldn't call this ‘torture porn’, as the scenes of pain and death are abnormally short and largely off camera, so maybe my rule remains unbroken. No ‘maybe ‘about this one - here’s one personal rule of mine that was ignored, as it is in all horror films, to the detriment of the ‘good guys’ – END THE THREAT. 

If (for example) the guy has chopped up and eaten your parents and the family poodle and you bonk him on the head, don’t just leave him there and run away to “look for a way out”. Kill the bugger on the spot, then if you have to, spend your whole bloody holiday searching for an exit without having to look over your shoulder. Or, ignore my advice and get eaten when he gets back up and catches you. Either/or.

Grade: a hesitant, rather sheepishly given ‘A-‘

**

By the way, the first and last movies were streamed via Netflix.  The Apparition is available, to your woe, at Redbox’s nationwide. 

If Death Ever Slept by Rex Stout

If Death Ever Slept is another Nero Wolfe mystery by the masterful Rex Stout. Archie is sent undercover into the home of a millionaire who suspects his daughter-in-law of being a ‘snake’, and before too long there’s a body or two laying around to get the plot rolling. Few complaints here, as Stout is rarely off the mark as a writer and his prose zings as expected, and the plot was sharp, *but * I do think they wrapped this one up at warp speed and without making a convincing case for guilt. Grade: B+

Smiley's 1st Reconciliation

Tuesday December 11^th was a big day for Smiley, as he had his First Reconciliation (Confession), the immediate precursor to receiving his First Holy Communion.

The ceremony was held at 6 pm in church, so first it was a full day of school followed by dinner. As a treat I did allow him unfettered access to the computer, keeping his sisters at bay until it was time to leave. Smiley decked himself out in his nice white shirt (the same one he wore on Thanksgiving) and a pair of dark pants, and off we went.

On the way into the church we were greeted by his religious ed teacher, who also taught YaYa and Lulu. “Round Three!” Lisa said, getting a warm smile in return.

Fourteen other kids had their First Reconciliation that day. There was a small ceremony, with a gospel reading (Luke 15:7, if memory serves) a short homily and some responsorial questions. Then, one by one, parents walked their kid to the confessional, introduced him to Fr. Spitz (I did the honors, calling Smiley by his first and middle name) and then stepping outside into the hall.

Lisa jokingly tried to listen at the door, but it was no dice.

Smiley had been nervous in the ten minutes before it was his turn, growing anxious and even a little short at the end (he’s a little me), but it went quickly and he emerged quite happy. Really, how could you screw up? Not sin?

We took a photo in the hall, and he was given a button, a certificate, and a candle that we then lit and placed in front of the altar. Less than half an hour later everyone was done, and after chatting briefly with Father Spitz and reclaiming the candle, we headed down to the church hall for cake and punch.

After that we stepped over to Walmart where we bought Smiley a much needed pair of shoes (two, actually, for $15 total) and a pair of pajama’s for him to wear to Pajama Day at school next week. We buy the kid pj’s twice a year, once for Christmas and once for Pajama Day. The rest of the year he sleeps in shorts and a t-shirt, so to my mind it’s a dang fine waste of $10, but such is the price of keeping up with societal expectations.

Congratulations BuddyBuddy! Mom and I are sooooooo proud of you!

Movie News and Reviews

Don’t get too worked up, because it doesn’t involve a birth/marriage/raise/Grammy nomination, but awesome news all the same! Thirty plus years ago my Grandpa and I sat down and watched a wicked action flick called “Dark of the Sun” starring Rod Taylor. Once Grandpa passed, I spent twenty plus years trying to track down the title of the movie, then found it wasn’t on DVD and was out of print on tape. I found a VHS copy in the library system, only to rent it and find out the video was damaged and unwatchable. End of story. Until . . . last night at work a supervisor hands me a copy of Entertainment Weekly and on page 59 is an unmistakable picture from the film – Taylor fighting a chainsaw wielding opponent! The remastered film (which counts Quentin Tarantino as a fan) is now available on DVD solely through Warner Archive on its direct order website warnerarchive.com.  You can bet that after the holidays I’ll be buying a copy of this, and hopefully watching it with my Smiley (if it isn’t as violent as I remember;  Grandpa had rather poor judgment on what was age-appropriate to watch)

Also out on DVD – Doctor Detroit, a cheesy Dan Aykroyd comedy about a college professor who moonlights as a pimp with a metal hand. I loved this as a kid (again, it wasn’t age appropriate). What I remember most is a scene where Aykroyd turns down the services of a drunk, down on his luck lawyer.  The scene tore me apart, and I cried and told my Grandparent’s that I wish we could go buy the lawyer some groceries, because he looked like he needed someone’s help. What can I say – I was a sappy, Smiley-like kid.

Men in Black 3 was pretty darn good. The plot is pretty simple, but unique enough to justify returning to what I’d consider a dead in the water franchise. Agent J travels back in time to 1969 to stop another time-traveler from killing Agent K and triggering an interstellar invasion. Kudos to Josh Brolin on a masterful job channeling Tommy Lee Jones, and while I saw the “emotional” plot point at the end from a mile away, the film as a whole was entertaining and great popcorn viewing. Grade: B+

What are the the best magazines in the world? I can’t answer that, by can tell you which ones are my favorites: Smithsonian, Entertainment Weekly, Archeology, and (a distant fourth) Biblical Archeology.

A Bad Day

So far today: my car battery died after work but the repair shop doesn't have the size in stock and won't until early afternoon. My watch stopped too, and my cell phone is acting up. YaYa came home sick from school in what I am certain is a deliberate attempt by the universe to scratch any attempt to enjoy what little remains of the day with my wife. Oh, and then when I had YaYa carry out a bag of garbage it broke all over the sidewalk and she refused to pick it up until I threatened all manner of terror. I have also not slept in close to 20 hours, and won't have the chance to for another four or five hours. Miserable, miserable day. Happy 12/12/12!

Smiley's new 2nd Grade School Pic - Get that kid a haircut!

A Princess in Peril, a World about to End, and a guy in a rubber suit. Star Wars? Nope just three reviews (and Vader wore leather, not rubber. Pay attention.)

A few nights ago a friend sat me down to watch The Princess Bride, a movie I’d never seen in its entirety. I knew the basic premise, and I knew it was written by screenwriting legend William Goldman (Marathon Man, Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid, All the President’s Men), but the rest of it was new to me.

So what did I think? I liked it, but only in a ho-hum, “that was a pleasant way to pass the time” manner.  There were a lot of pluses, to be sure. Top to bottom it was a great cast, with Robin Wright’s pure beauty and Mandy Patinkin’s awesome talent headlining the list for me. I thought the story itself was good, although certainly nothing original. I like that the special effects were pretty non-existent, which is refreshing to eyes that are sick of CGI. The interaction between the grandpa and his grandson was sweet.

The bad? Well there was no ‘bad’, just ‘less good’.  As I said, the story wasn’t original in the least, and I’m in the distinct minority in saying that the humor largely distracted me from what  little story there was on screen.  And while I raved about the cast a paragraph ago, in truth I found Cary Elwes’ portrayal of Wesley to be too over the top for my liking.

I’m fully aware that I come off as a joykill, but I rate this a B-

Seeking a Friend for the End of the World is a bittersweet little dramedy starring Steve Carell and Keira Knightley as two neighbors who spend the last few days of mankind on a quest to fulfill their last wishes: his to confess his feelings for his true love and Knightley to find a plane to carry her home to her parents one last time.  Whether they reach their goals is beside the point, as the experience changes them in ways neither could have foreseen.

A friend asked me if this was like Melancholia, and other than the impending doom of planet Earth, I told her no, it isn’t ; Melancholia was a festering heap of hopelessness, not just for the future but for the present and the past – nothing mattered, and nothing ever would.  It dang near drove me into waking off a short pier. This is in many ways the opposite. The future is non-existent, but that fact is almost secondary to, well, everything.  What’s important is that the few days they have left are spent making the whole of their lives accumulate some value beyond just ‘being’, and so, even as disaster looms, I think this film resonates with the wonder of life.

I enjoyed it, and despite some noticeable flaws, I’d rate it an A-

Finally, Lisa and I finished watching Season 1 of American Horror Story on Netflix.  I don’t think it quite lived up to the hype my friends piled on it, or the critical acclaim it racked up, but given the mountains of each saying it wasn’t tip-top still means  it was grand.

At first I was put out by how often the show plagiarized real-life tragedies – Columbine, Richard Speck, the Lindbergh kidnapping – but then Lisa, in her wisdom, pointed out they were key tragedies of American life and thus part of the mosaic of an American horror story.  Smart girl that one, but I will argue that the appearance of the Black Dahlia herself was too much, no matter the scholastic interpretation. 

Still, bit by bit as the storyline evolved I was drawn in, and had the series ended after episode 11 (the birth), I’d have walked away saying “wow”. The final episode, which seems written just to force a “happy ending”,  felt contrived to me and watered down the whole. In fact, I think if you trimmed the fat this 12 episode (mini)series would have been tighter and cleaner at 8 or 9 hours of TV, but that’s splitting hairs. There were plenty of great twists and turns (Violet’s status, for instance) to keep us all from grabbing the remote. 

[Special kudos to Evan Peters, who played Tate. He’s a wonderful actor, and I expect we’ll see more of him in the future]

Grade: B+

The Empire Strikes Back

The three youngest kids and I sat down and watched "The Empire Strikes Back" this evening. Because the prequel story-lines are what are pushed on Smiley's generation, the "I am your father" line wasn't as impactful as I thought it would be; he was still visibly upset, but only because it was the first time he had concrete evidence that the hero he roots for in "Clone Wars" turns evil. 

What was great to see was his reaction to Vader cutting off Luke's hand - Smiley gasped and covered his mouth with both hands in stunned disbelief. :)

I Think It Is, Come to Think of It

I know this is slightly insane, but I think the highlight of my life to date - yes, possibly THE highlight - might just be meeting Jimmy Page in 2000.

Lulu loves her new school pic, saying she looks like a 'businesswoman" - 4th Grade

A New WNBA Star In the Making!

Just after returning from a three day vacation with a friend at Christmas Mountain, LuLu played in her first basketball game for the Cudahy Girls Basketball Club. She did well - much better than I expected based on my own time in grade school basketball. 

She led the team in rebounding and twice stole the ball, once running it all the way across the court to her own basket. There were better players on the court, but not by leaps and bounds, and none were nearly as beautiful. 

Well done LuLu!

Ginger in her school pic retake - K5

The Anderson Tapes

Book #93 The Anderson Tapes is the Edgar award winning first novel by Lawrence Sanders circa 1970. It’s the story of a high stakes robbery told via the fictional transcripts of conversations recorded by surveillance equipment. It’s a fair tale told in a quick entertaining way, tho’ some of the slang and racial/sexual language is quite dated. I’m not sure I see this as Edgar worthy, even for the time, but I’d still grade it a B.

West to Cambodia by S.L.A. Marshall

Book #96: West to Cambodia by S.L.A. Marshall is a contemporary non-fiction retelling of US Army small unit action along the Cambodian border in late 1966. I consider myself a fan of Marshall’s narratives, but I think this one read a little choppy and heavy-handed; I’m hoping it is a fluke and that my prior opinions weren’t mistaken. Still, it’s an interesting read and he doesn’t spare the troops he interviewed from an honest assessment of their actions. Men leave equipment behind, miss from point blank range, engage in an hour long firefight with an enemy who wasn’t there, and in the last episode an American company walks headfirst into a bloody, catastrophic ambush. Grade: C+

Mad River by John Sandford

Book #95 of 2012: 

Mad River is a Virgil Flowers novel by John Sandford. Three people go on a killing spree in a remote Minnesota county, leading to a manhunt that will last days and leave a trail of bodies behind. 

I fully acknowledge Sandford as a genius of the mystery genre, and this one is a fine example of his craft. The portions of the narrative devoted to the killers’ flows like In Cold Blood mashed with Bonnie and Clyde, but without stumbling in blunt imitation, and I love how Sandford incorporates an affection for his home state into every facet of the book without turning it into a tourist guide put out by the local chamber of commerce.

Grade: A+

Three '70's Greats

If you know me, you've probably picked up on the fact that I’m overly fond of the 1970’s, at least when it comes to movies, TV, and, to an extent, music.

Let me state it clearly: I believe the 1970’s were the single greatest decade for movie making to date.  The ‘70’s produced Godfather I and II, Annie Hall, Taxi Driver, Rocky, Jaws, All the President’s Men, Star Wars, Young Frankenstein, just to name a few. Even the clunkers were epic; Attack of the Killer Tomatoes and Rocky Horror Picture Show, for instance.

This past week I finally got a chance to watch three of the undisputed best offerings of that golden decade.

Network is best known for its “I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore!” scree, which is certainly worth remembering.  

Still, it’s a shame that memory of the film has been largely reduced to one catchy line of dialogue. For those of you unfamiliar with Network, it’s the story of a television news anchor that slips off the rails and speaks his mind on the air, and the ensuing ratings boost inspires the network to make the newscast more of a circus than an informational broadcast.

It was intended as broad satire, an exaggerated swipe at the business of television. Flash forward nearly 40 years and much of that satire is unrecognizable. Oh, sure, we don’t have psychics on our nightly news (yet), but much of the ‘insanity’ of the network decisions is just par for the course in this day and age. It reads much ‘straighter’ now than it ever did when it was released.

It is a finely written film with inspired performances by the entire cast; my one complaint would be that each character seems contractually obligated to launch into at least one long, preachy monologue during each act.

Grade A+

Next up was Marathon Man, the Lawrence Oliver/Dustin Hoffmann thriller best known for the torture scene in Oliver’s dentist’s chair. I thought it was a good thriller, though I remain a little confused as to the relationship between the American agents and Oliver’s Nazi character. Additionally the final scenes in the water treatment plant seemed flat, and I’ve heard a rumor that the author of the source material was annoyed with it too.

A great movie? Eh. A very good movie? Yes. More proof screenwriter William Goldman is a Hollywood genius? Darn skippy. 

Grade: B+

I have seen and read more about Dog Day Afternoon than just about any film out there (it even popped up in a novel I just read) and so I was eager to see this Pacino classic. The verdict? Wow. As good as advertised.

Pacino is perfect as the quirky, slightly effeminate Sonny, while John Cazale’s otherwise minuscule part resonates with hopelessness and an undercurrent of violence. Were there flaws? Precious few. The police response to the bank robbery seems ham-fisted and overblown to my eyes, , but I’ll chalk that up to a different time and place.

The grade for this film is a no-brainer from me: A+

YaYa's stunning new school pic - 6th grade

Quote of the Day

Last Wednesday I picked Smiley up from his First Communion class. On the way home I asked him about his teacher, a beautiful young woman who also taught YaYa and Lulu.

“Is she nice?” I said.

“Yes,” he replied.

“She’s awfully cute. Don’t you think so?”

He shook his head no. I was surprised. Smiley has always had an eye for the ladies. “What kind of girl do you like? I asked.

He shrugged.

“Do you like brunettes?” I asked.

“What’s brunettes?”

“Dark haired girls.”

“No, blondes.”

Hmm, I prefer brunettes. 

“Tall or short?”

“Short.”

Huh. I like tall women. 

“Skinny or with some meat on their bones?”

 “Meat,” he said, then held his thumb and forefinger out, just a hair apart. He turned to me with a wicked little grin, his eyes dancing with mischief. “But just a lil bit”