google.com, pub-4909507274277725, DIRECT, f08c47fec0942fa0 Slapinions: Some Comedy Sites to Check out

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Sunday, March 16, 2008

Some Comedy Sites to Check out

Has anyone noticed that the AOL people connection page, which lists 'recently updated blogs' has been taken over by spam? Twice in the last day the list of blogs was dominated by spam generating journals. AOL needs to get on the ball.

Anyway, I wanted to introduce you, fair reader, to two new sites of note. Both are humourous but probably an aquired taste. Proceed at your own risk. .

The first, Stuff White People Like, is either a self-deprecating, tongue in cheek creation of a white guy, or a mildy insulting, very funning page written by a minority. Either way, it's a great read. I'm kind of hoping it is written by a minority, because then my acceptance of the humour, as I shrug off the insult without overreacting, would definitely fall among the life habits White People Like.

"It is also worth noting that a gay friendship of any sort allows white people to feel as though they are a part of the gay rights movement. While white people love being a part of any movement,  . .

Gay friends are an essential part of a white person’s all-star diversity roster. But they are always on the lookout for the ultimate friend; a gay minority.

It is generally accepted that a gay black friend with a child is considered a once in a lifetime opportunity - like a quarterback who can pass, run, kick, and play linebacker. White people will crawl over each other for the opportunity to claim this person as a friend and add them to their roster of diversity.

Once a white person has told you about their gay friends, it is recommended that you say “I wish more people were like you,” every few months. This will allow them to feel good about their progressive choice of friends and remind them that they are better than other white people."

OR

The most time and cost efficient way of gaining a white person’s trust and friendship is to talk to them about their time in high school.

Virtually every white person you meet was a nerd in a high school-it it is how they were able to get into a good arts program and law school. As such, their memories of high school are painful, but not tragic since they were able to eventually find success in the real world. . .

If you cannot properly gauge the type of music a white person liked in high school, you should always say that you were really into The Cure. All white people know that liking The Cure in high school is an invitation to be tortured by the cool kids.  . .

It is also acceptable to discuss how you were in love with a cool kid who never loved you back."

* * * * *

I'd also recommend A Site of Jean's Own, featuring the world renowned wisdom of Jean Teasdale, long time columnist for the renowned Onion, America's Finest News Source.

"If you're considering starting your own business, keep a few things in mind. First, you can't call in sick, and you may have to work very long hours, even if no customers show up for the entire day. Second, be prepared for weeks, or even months, to go by before you clear $50 a week in sales. Third, consider that you may have to rethink your business plan, even though you devoted a whole month to creating it.

I gotta say, Jeanketeers, after two months of helping my dad run his Off-Season Santa store, I'm ready to throw in the towel—and the giant plastic candy canes, and the colored lights, and anything else in our store that isn't nailed down! Frankly, Dad and I overestimated the level of year-round yuletide cheer in our community. We're lucky if we get three serious customers a day (and by serious, I mean people willing to pose for a photo with Dad/Santa or buy a Christmas knickknack). Mostly, Dad and I sit around in our costumes playing Go Fish and Crazy Eights.

I don't get it. We've made Santa Claus' lap available seven days a week, 365 days a year, but no one seems to care! You'd think, what with the war, that people would be chomping at the bit for a little whimsy and delight! True, we're located in a dilapidated strip mall in a seedy part of town, but people have cars, don't they?"

It's a pip!

Oh, andI love this article from the Onion:

Novelists Strike Fails To Affect Nation Whatsoever

LOS ANGELES—The Novelists Guild of America strike, now entering its fourth month, has had no impact on the nation at all, sources reported Tuesday.

The strike, which scholars say could be the longest since 1951, when American novelists may or may not have voluntarily committed to a six-month work stoppage, has brought an immediate halt to all new novels, novellas, and novelettes from coast to coast, affecting no one.

Nor has America's economy seen any adverse effects whatsoever, as consumers easily adjust to the sudden cessation of any bold new sprawling works of fiction or taut psychological character studies.

"There's a novelists strike?" Ames, IA consumer Carl Hailes said. "That's terrible. When is it scheduled to begin?"

 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

LOVE The Onion...good schtuff. ;)  C.