Quote of the Day

This past Thursday, after each of the kids had their weekly dance class, we treated them out for dinner at an Italian fast food restaurant. Near the end of the meal Ginger asked Lisa the following question:

"Do you like piss?"

Everyone stopped eating in shock. "What did you say?" Lisa asked.

"Do you like piss?" she repeated. LuLu started giggling and Smiley was living up to his nickname.

Ginger, for her part, couldn't understand what all the fuss was about and was getting angry. "Do you like piss? Lot's of people like piss. Stop laughing! Dad likes to eat piss, lots of people eat piss!"

LuLu and Smiley were laughing outright by that point, and Lisa, mindful of the people dining nearby, was frantically trying to quiet Ginger while at the same time understand what she was saying.

(YaYa was involved in a frantic text back and forth regarding an upcoming school dance and was oblivious until we repeated the story. Pre-teens. Sigh).

Finally, it dawned on me.

"Fish? Are you trying to say 'fish'?"

Ginger's shoulders sagged with relief. "Yes. Piss, like the little pissies that swim in the ocean."

Yes. Just like the little pissies that swim in the ocean. :)

Bleep the Refs

Well, that was a crap job of officiating.

Man, I don't know what's worse. The officiating, or having to watch Stephanie Sutton struggle to ad-lib on the news afterwards. It's damn near a toss up.

Everyone please send your comments about the game tonight to:

officeofcommissioner@nfl.com 

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell at (212) 450-2000 

Walking Home from School

'Tis True

Here's a quote, completely unrelated to the show, that addresses the only flaw in the marvelous Dr. Who episode "Vincent and The Doctor": 

"Vincent Van Gogh (pronounced Van-GOCK by the Dutch, and sundry pretentious . . . twits)   - Victor Lavalle.

My Thoughts - In defense of UWM

I notice the Journal is running yet another article blasting UWM students and listing the alleged grievances of neighborhood residents.

 A - UWM will always take a hit in the local press while Marquette would earn a pass even if their students lynched their neighbors. 

B - If you buy a home two blocks from a college, you lose all rights to complain about the inevitable fusses of *living two blocks from a college*, you idiot.

C - if you are a resident around UWM, you and your whining has led to the restrictive parking regulations that plagued me and everyone else for years. Ergo, FU.

Katy Perry: Part of Me

I rented "Katy Perry: Part of Me" for the kids Friday night and caught most of it myself on Saturday. It was a good, uplifting concert film/career documentary, and I'd easily grade it a B. Unusual bit of trivia: the pivotal artist that inspired Perry, leading directly to her abandoning a gospel career for pop? None other than the great Alanis Morissette.

The Broken Ones by Stephen M. Irwin

In "The Broken Ones" by Stephen M. Irwin, on a day forever known as s "Gray Wednesday", every human being on Earth found themselves haunted by a ghost only they can see. Three years later society has nearly crumbled, plagued by alarming suicide rates, spiritual confusion, and economic collapse.

In this landscape Detective Oscar Mariani is assigned to investigate murders that are said to be the result of people driven mad by their ghosts, and he stumbles upon a ritualistic murder that no one seems to want him to solve. The case will threaten not only his career, but his life and the lives of those he loves. 

What did I think of the book? Eh. I'm ambivalent. Great premise, but the ghosts didn't have all that much of a role in the book beyond ruining society, and I'm still not clear on how they did that. The writing was solid but didn't 'zing', but, BUT I think the mystery itself was really developed well, and I liked all the emotional baggage Mariani carried around. 

My grade: B Book#77 of the year.

I'm Moving Shifts

A sad day at work(s) today. At FT job it was my last day on 1st before moving shifts, so it meant saying goodbye to a lot of people I'd grown surprisingly fond of seeing every day. Oh, sure, Justin F I could do without, but I'll miss Kim, Jenny, Kristin, etc. I was also 'traded' from one management team to another, which was a shock. Then at PT job it may/may not have been the last night of work, unless I can find a last minute sub for some of the hours that conflict with FT. So, melancholia abounds.

The Amazing Spider-Man

On a recent Sunday I took YaYa and Smiley to see "The Amazing Spider-Man" at the budget cinema. I wasn't keen on seeing it, despite being a Spidey fan all my life. Why bother, I thought, when it was a reboot of a franchise that ran its course within the last decade? How many times do you need to see a guy bitten by a radioactie/mutated spider? Pass,  I thought.

Man, was I wrong. It was great. Much better, in my opinion, than the Tobey Mcguire version. Why?

a. They kept the timeframe compact, starting and ending with Peter a high school student (presumably in the same school year). So instead of the mandatory regurgetation of the origin story, followed by what feels like a seperate good vs evil story a year or two down the road, it felt like a single, cohesive storyline.

b. Gwen Stacey. I can't tell you how peeved I was that the Tobey movie retconned her away.

c. The script was more mature. Not 'mature' in a 'violent/sexual/brooding' way, but fleshed out beyond the basic respect due the mythology. Uncle Ben dies, yes, and he dies in a roundabout way because of Peter's inaction (although no indication is given that the guy is armed or violent at the time, which I thought should have been foreshadowed ). But unlike the prior filmed version Peter's inaction seems well, natural, and Ben isn't killed as a bystander, but as a man living and dying by the code of responsiblity he instilled in his nephew. Likewise, I liked that Ben called him out on his revenge against Flash; later that insight comes back to shake him out of his narrow pursuit of Ben's killer and gives birth to the true Spider-Man.

d. Sally Field. Martin Sheen.

e . Somehow the script manages to bring in Peter's parents and their (presumed?) deaths, hint that Flash may become a friend, leaves Ben's killer  still on the loose, and has Norman Osborn in the background yet still controlling all the  bad karma of the film, and yet I never got the sense that they were setting the table for sequels. Of course that's what they were doing, but it was integrated well enough where this one stands as a legitimate one-off.

f. Spidey is sarcastic and talkative in a fight. Man I missed that.

g. I never bought Tobey as Spidey. Yes, he played the geek well, but remember, Peter was a geek only in high school. By his mid-twenties he was a confident man (barely) making a living in the city and dating a model. I could never see that transformation taking place with Tobey. But Garfield? Brother I buy that hook, line and sinker.

h. SPOILER:  At the end of the film Peter has promised Gwen's dying father that he will no longer see her. The two are now estranged. Peter arrives late for class and takes a seat behind her, and the teacher chastises him for being late. He promises it will never happen again, and the teacher says he shouldn't make promises he can't keep. Peter replies, just loud enough for Gwen to hear: "But those are the best kind," signifying that he will break his word and resume their relationship. Without turning around Gwen breaks into a small but lovely smile, and I just about said "awwww". What a wonderful, subtle, heartwarming scene.

Grade: A

Change is Needed

Junie on a good day - Just Kidding!

The Anderson Platoon

A few weeks back I watched "The Anderson Platoon", a 1966 French documentary that follows a U.S. infantry platoon in Vietnam. The hook, for that era, was that the platoon was led by black West Point grad Joseph B. Anderson. The film is well regarded and often praised, but I thought it was a poorly edited mess. 

Yes, there are poignant images (the body of a U.S. soldier we met earlier is left out in the open on a tarp awaiting transport/a chopper crash is caught on film/a GI on leave blows his earnings on a prostitute) but it's all just random images pieced together with little narration and no real sense of a narrative thrust. 

Sure, someone can argue that the documentary mimics the chaos and uncertainty of the Vietnam war itself, but that's academic gobbbledegook; I don't think that was the intent here, I simply think the filmmaker was content to let the film roll without a guiding hand.

I give it a C as a film, a B+ as a historical time capsule.

The Cabin in the Woods

I just got done watching "The Cabin the Woods", a horror film about a group of people who are the unwitting pawns in a complex sacrifice to ancient, hungry gods. Five minutes into it I knew the writing was strong enough to craft a winner, but my oh my did it exceed my expectations. It's funny when it should be ("Good work zombie arm!"), wickedly original without being obnoxious about it, and just plain good. I loved it. Grade: A+

Mr. Monk and the Blue Flu" by Lee Goldberg

Today I finished reading "Mr. Monk and the Blue Flu" by Lee Goldberg. When San Francisco's cops go on a work stoppage Mr. Monk is drafted by the mayor to become the temporary homicide Captain. I liked the story, and the dialouge, but dang nabbit I still feel using Natalie's voice to tell the tale is wrong, in part because I don't think Goldberg has enough flair to pull it off. Grade: C+ Book #76 of the year

A Sad but Honest Quote

The ugly truth was that these [psychiatric] patients weren't here to be cured. There were no cures for them. They had illnesses that had to be managed, by them and by those who treated them. They were like ships that would never find a shore. The most you could do was bring them supplies; the most they could do was get used to the rocking, the unpredictability, of the vast, impenetrable ocean below them," - Victor Lavalle, The Devil in Silver

Victory

The Sad Sack Slapjacks won this past weekend, bumping me up to 1-1 on the year. Final tally: 134.50 to 115.40

Fax

Carson Daly: Ryan Seacrest's older, much, much duller brother

That was a heck of a storm

Our power just came back on. I had walked the kids home from school, not realizing there was a storm coming until it was too late. I hustled those kids hard and we made it home in record time, literally setting foot on the front porch just as the wind picked up enough to blow down a nearby tree limb and dump rain and hail in great gushes. The power was out within a minute or two of that, then our street flooded and so did Oklahoma, which is still a lake around Whitnall Ave. Jeez.

re: Smiley - he was fine. took a nap actually

Occupy Wall Street

Lol

150 years on

Today is the 150th anniversary of the Battle of Antietam, where more than 2100 Union soldiers lost their lives ending Lee's invasion of Maryland. It was more or less a tactical draw (though Lee fled the field) largely because McClellan failed to commit a full 3rd of his forces and would not pursue a retreating enemy (costing him his job). However, it was and remains a significant strategic victory for the Union, allowing Lincoln the means to issue the Emancipation Proclamation and preventing England and France from recognizing the Confederacy. To those who lost their lives on that day near Sharpsburg, thank you. RIP.

Bad News at Work

Crappy news at part-time job today. I'm taking a different shift at FT job, the better to secure long-term employment (I hope). I submitted a new availability schedule at PT, but the GM rejected it out of hand, saying my value to the store was in working X and Y hours and that's that. Well, actually she said a lot of nice things too, but the crux of it is I'm SOL and will be reduced to 'seasonal'. Somehow, by attempting to better myself I've wound up MINUS an income. Grand. Just f'ing grand.

Well, if history holds I'll sleep in the AM til noon or 1, live out my day, crash for an hour in primetime and then head into work. But that was then. Now? Now I have grey hair where I didn't know grey hair could grow. So I'm unsure how to proceed yet.

Benghazi - My Thoughts

The Libyan government, responding to the White House's claim that the embassy attack was merely a protest against an anti-Muslim film, not against a planned assault against the U.S. says Obama's stance is QUOTE  'completely unfounded and preposterous'. 

They state that is was an Al-Qaeda attack, *NOT* a protest.  Intelligence reports from the region warned of the likelihood of an attack days before it happened, the 'protesters' were armed with RPG's, U.S. uniforms, and detailed info about the location of American safe houses, and it occurred on 9/11. Meanwhile, a coordinated assault on a NATO base where Prince Harry is stationed happened on the same day. 

Quit the B.S, and have your lapdogs at CNN drop the smokescreen. We got stung, and stung badly, because the Obama policy of disengagement has emboldened what was once an enemy reduced to hiding in the shadows. PERIOD. 

And please, someone with a respect for the Constitution stop the full court press  against this filmmaker. His work didn't inspire violence, *a culture of intolerance and bloodshed did that*. 

I do not go around murdering people and rioting when Christians are mocked by as*holes like Bill Maher, or when sacrilegious crap like Dan Brown's entire body of work is on the NY Times Bestseller list. But it's the filmmakers fault when these 'protesters' murder and loot in their religion's name? 

Pathetic. Hypocritical. And Pathetic.

Smiley impersonates Mr. Monk

Smiley and I went for a good long walk the other night (~ 3 miles) and he chatted non-stop. While he didn't notice anything amiss, an alarming amount of his conversation centers on worry and anxiety.

Some topics he chose to discuss:

What causes a heart attack? 

Would you (meaning me, Dad) survive getting shot? 

We live on a street that is too busy and has too much traffic. It is unsafe. 

[explaining why he would not walk on the park side of the street]The park is spooky at night. 

[as we passed people eating dinner at a sidewalk cafe] They shouldn't do that.  I would never eat outside. They could be shot!

If you couldn't pay your bills but you still had a job, and we had to move, where would we live? 

Why don't we have a panic room in the house? (!!!!)

Sometimes I think maybe someone with a sword will break into the house and kill us. But probably not. The doors are pretty thick. 

[when told that if someone with a sword broke in, they'd still have to get past me before he'd have to worry about it] Yeah, you are strong. But I think you would lose if he had a sword. 

Why don't we have a panic room? (again)

[when passing across the street from a shop with a flat roof] Do you think if someone was on the roof and they shot at us, they could hit us from here?Even if they did, it would probably not kill us. 

[when asked why the heck he's so obsessed with the idea of being shot/shot at, he looked incredulous and said:] 'Cause  we live in a bad neighborhood!

[when told that we, in fact, do not live in a bad neighborhood but in a rather safe one, he shrugged] Bad things happen everywhere

People are always dying. I do not want you to die. I am only seven and I do not want to lose my Dad. If you died I would be very upset, but I would plan your funeral. I would have lots and LOTS of candles around your coffin. But I would blow them all out before we left because candles can cause a fire and that would be bad. 

I think I will be a good driver when I am older. [by this he means safe; God willing he will be]

[this next quote was actually from a week or two before, at a McDonald's playland] I do not like Ginger playing in that tunnel. Look, the screws [nuts] do not look tight all the way. If Ginger was in that tunnel, and some other kid came in the tunnel, and another kid jumped too much, it could fall and she could be trapped!


When I told him he worries too much and should just concentrate on the here and now, he looked confused.

Smiley: I don't worry too much
Me: You worry all the time. 
Smiley: No I don't. 
Me: Smiley, you worry so much you don't know what it's like not to worry. If I could take it out of your head, it would feel like a bowling ball was lifted out of your brain. 

Sigh. Truly he is my son. :(

A Team Slap Cake

Quote

"Men always want to *die* for something. For someone. I can see the appeal. You do it once and it's done. No more worrying, not knowing, about tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow. I know you all think it sounds brae, but I'll tell you something even braver. To struggle and fight for the ones you love today. And then do it all over again the next day. Every day. For your whole life. It's not as romantic, I admit. But it takes a lot of courage to live for someone, too."

- Victor Lavalle