John Wick 4

I saw this with LuLu at the 9:50pm showing yesterday at Showtime Cinema, off Loomis Rd.  We were just about the only people left in the building by the time it ended. 

I love the Wick franchise and enjoyed the heck out of this film, but I will not pretend that it was little more than a expertly choreographed, bloody carnival ride. 

If you want plot and character depth and even the slightest bit of realism, go watch the masterful first entry in the series and leave the rest of us alone with the subsequent violent fluff LOL

Smile

 

Dem saw this in the theater and loved it, so I was eager to stream it. 

I agree with Dem - it was a very good, very entertaining horror flick. 

Nothing too gory, nothing too simplistic, just a Godilocks of the genre. 

Watch it!

The Batman

 

The world did not need another Batman movie, but that doesn't change the fact that it was a fine addition to his cinematic universe. 

This version takes place with a much younger Bruce Wayne, only a few years into his career as the Caped Crusader, as he hunts down a very dark, troubled version of the Riddler that is terrorizing the leaders of Gotham. The Penguin is here too, played as mafioso capo, by a convincing and unrecognizable Collin Ferrell. Yet he plays no role in the plot, and I struggle to see why he was included, other than to set up future films. 

There's a lot to enjoy about this film. The first few minutes that introduce Batman, where you see the fear that has crept into the minds of Gotham's criminals, is delicious filmmaking. So too was the decision to make this a mystery and highlight Batman's status as "The World's Greatest Detective," an aspect of the character that had been overlooked as gadgets and physical prowess took center stage. 

What wasn't good? A 3 hour runtime achieved by ignoring the organic end to the movie and tacking on another "rescue mission" that was unnecessary and robbed the movie of its pacing. 

All in all though, a movie worth watching. 

Grade: B+

The Menu

A young couple travels to an isolated island to visit a very exclusive restaurant, where they will dine on the dishes of a dedicated, world famous Chef - but dinner doesn't go quite as planned when the Chef reveals his sinister new menu. 

I was legitimately surprised by how much I enjoyed watching The Menu. It was a genuine treat. 

 Until I actually saw the film I thought the trailer gave away 90% of the movie, but oops on me. It's not the most complicated plot - it moves from A to B to C in deliberate steps, but there's plenty of little goodies to surprise you along the way.  Thankfully, it never takes itself too seriously - enough not to fall into comedy, not so much as to make this a dull lecture on the human condition. 

It was fun. And really, that's more than enough. 

Grade: A

Raquel Welch

Raquel Welch, the actress and sex symbol whose beauty transcended the decades, died yesterday at 82. 

My introduction to her? Watching Fantastic Voyage on TV as a kid, and feeling some grown up feelings when her skintight suit was covered by antibodies that had to be ripped off her body LOL 

RIP 

Dan and Lisa's Day of Fun

Today Lisa and I spent the day together on a "Dan and Lisa's Day of Fun." 

It started at 8 am, with dropping Junie off at her job. Then it was on to 49th and North, to have breakfast at McBob's, a Scottish themed restaurant that has garnered significant praise online of late. 

Full embarrassing disclosure: they do not have the strongest commercially available chairs, and the rickety wood left me nervous. On the other hand, they held me without incident, so I guess that's a moot complaint. 

Lisa got an apple crisp scone with her breakfast. 

I ordered "Bacon Benedict" two medium poached eggs with bacon, served with hollandaise over a slice of "bacon bread" (what that is, I am not sure.)

It was a good dish but not spectacular. The eggs were done perfectly, but I should have ordered them over easy. The accompanying hash browns (not pictured) were greasy and not to my liking. 

Lisa ordered steak & eggs with American potatoes. The steak was cooked expertly but was a bit cold by the time it reached the table. 

The total (including a 18% automatic gratuity) was $49. A little steep, in my opinion. But not completely out of line. 

It was good enough to return but not good enough to brag about - yet.  Maybe next time. 

Then we went thrifting at Goodwill, wasted an hour in the car playing on our phones, and headed to the movies to see the 4k/3D 25th anniversary release of Titanic.

This was our 14th theater viewing of the film, but the first since its original release. 

Still a great film. The second half, from iceberg hit onwards? Incredible. 

But age grants you a different perspective on art. 

Lisa was the first one to say this aloud after the show, but Rose, as seen from the POV of a pair of late forty-somethings who've raised four kids? Well, she's a whole heck of a lot more entitled, spoiled, and bratty than she was in 1997.  

She's 17 and rich. She spends the trip partying and sleeping around behind her fiance's back, then paints him as irrational in his anger. She callously abandons her Mother, leaving her to forever mourn her daughter's "death."  She literally calls her first class accomodations "a slave ship" carrying her "in chains" because of the  burden of living in a stifled, privileged level of society. That's hyperbole of massive proportions. 

I mean, she's 101. Did her perspective remain that narrow, even into old age? Why would she be happy her fiance eventually killed himself? It's been 84 years Rose. Forgive a little. 

Anyway, afterwards we ran to Walmart, returned home to a meal of walking tacos cooked by JJ, then I went to Collectivo with LuLu to keep her company as she did her homework. 

A long, happy, productive day!

 

Knock at the Cabin

 

Yesterday, after the art show, Lisa and I took in a showing of  M. Night Shyamalan's Knock at the Cabin.

A vacationing gay couple and their daughter are held captive by four home invaders who believe the world will end unless they convince the family to willingly sacrifice the life of one of their own. Are they insane, or prophets of the apocalypse? Or have they targeted the couple in a complicated, twisted version of a hate crime? The couple must decide before time runs out for them - and maybe the world. 

This is, by my count, the eighth Shyamalan movie Lisa and I have watched in a theater. It's kind of a tradition of ours. And as much as we love his work overall, there's never been a film where we didn't identify a conspicuous flaw that knocked you out of the moment, even if only for a moment.  It was just his "thing."

I'll be danged if I found any such flaw yesterday.

Start to finish, it worked. It kept you terrified for the family, constantly feeding you just enough clues to make you start to believe the intruders, before tossing doubt into the mix and bringing you back to Earth. The backstory of the couple? Not a bit of it was superfluous, all of it clearly shaping the events of the day. The acting? Spot on. Dave Bautista, man, he deserves to move past the spectre of "wrestler turned actor." 

Now kudos of course to Paul Tremblay, the author who penned the novel on which the film is based.

There are, the internet tells me, significant plot points that diverge from page to screen, but clearly having Shyamalan work off a strong pre-established source paid dividends here.  (that doesn't explain the Airbender debacle, but still). 

I grade this a solid A. 

Go see it!

Old

Old is a 2021 horror film by M Night Shyamalan that follows a group of resort guests who become trapped on a beach where they begin to age rapidly.

 Although it’s an ensemble cast, it focuses primarily on a married couple and their two young children. The children are there, at least at first, just so the audience can quickly grasp the physics of the beach, as we watch them age into adults in a matter of hours.  But the story quickly becomes that of the marriage, and how our relationship with time and death alters how we deal with one another. It’s almost a sweet romance,  if you disregard the blood and fear and supernatural murder.

I’m a fan of Shyamalan, but like most of his work there are flaws that jump out at you. Once again, a mentally ill person is given the role of villain in his films. Once is fine. Twice is co-incidence But when four or five of your movies use “mental illness” and “criminal” as synonymous, you’ve got some explaining to do.

And the end, the very last few minutes? No, it isn’t a problem with a “twist” – he’s moved past that. It’s that it wasn’t believable. And when you watch a movie about a beach that turns you old in a day, and it’s the ending that makes you say “man, that wouldn’t happen,” then you done messed it up.

Grade: B 

 

Moonfall

 

I'm not going to say something snarky like "I'm dumber for having watched this," but I would have when this blog was new. 

The moon, affected by what appears to be an alien life form, breaks its orbit and approaches Earth, causing chaos and disaster around the globe. Two intrepid astronauts - one, of course, stripped of his job and his reputation for having warned the world in the first place - take off on a missiont o save the world. 

I am not a scientist, but I'm pretty sure 95% of this movie was hooey - there is a moon, so they got that right - and if you can't predict every action in the plot then congratulations on watching your very first movie!

That said, it was entertaining enough to pass the time. So it wasn't all bad.

Grade: C 

When You Finish Saving The World

This movie is impeccable, almost an art film.  Did I watch it [January 20th] just because my youngest is a Finn super fan and I was forced? Absolutely.  Would I recommend it to a non fan? Absolutely.  Julianne Moore was awesome too. Go see it, you'll enjoy it. - Lisa

Idiocy

Alec Baldwin intends to finish 'Rust' production despite facing involuntary manslaughter charges, source says. Despite facing involuntary manslaughter charges connected to the “Rust” set shooting death of a cinematographer, Alec Baldwin intends to finish the movie's production.

THIS IS NUTS TO ME.

- Lisa

The Pale Blue Eye

The Pale Blue Eye is a historical mystery set at West Point during the 1830's. A cadet is murdered and his corpse violated, and a noted constable, played by Christian Bale, is called in to investigate. He soon realizes he needs someone inside the Academy walls to help him, and he enlists cadet Edgar Allan Pole in his quest. 

Yes, that Poe. Yes, Poe really did attend West Point. 

The movie was atmospheric and engaging - up to a point. I think Poe's inclusion renders the story more of a novelty than it needed to be, and the odd witchcraft angle twists the film (briefly) into a 19th century  Da Vinci Code. 

I liked the movie, but its flaws are obvious. Watch it - if you don't have better things to do with your time. 

 

White Noise

 White Noise is the Netflix adaptation of the postmodern, US National Book Award winning novel of the same name by Don DeLillo.  Adam Driver, Greta Gerwig, and Don Cheadle share top billing.

Now, with a pedigree like that, you expect a movie to be a little stiffer than the norm, and less concerned with entertainment than with making a point about the human condition. Weekend at Bernie's this ain't. 

That said, I think it still made a good effort to keep the viewer, if not happy, than at least willing to stick around for the ride. 

Jack and Babette are a married couple in charge of a large blended family - he is on his 5th marriage, and she is not far behind - and while they are madly in love, both with each other and their children, death is constantly on their minds. They worry about it. They fear it. They talk about it.  They avoid talking about it. And so on. 

When a train accident creates an "airborne toxic event" in their sleepy little college town, the family hits the road to flee, and begin to confront their fears, not altogether successfully. 

The movie is told in three narrative blocks: the lead up to the train accident, the escape from the "event", and a 3rd block devoted to a jarring departure from the first 3/4ths of the movie. 

The acting was top notch, right down to the child actors playing the kids. I enjoyed the movie (my last of 2022) but it is, undoubtedly, an acquired taste and not for everyone.  I'd grade it a C+.

* * * 

In closing I pause to express an irrational complaint I have about the film:

It is set in the mid-1980's a fact that is contextually established by the clothing, music, cars, and product packaging. Maybe it won't be enough to identify the era if you're watching it from the year 2345, but it should be more than enough clues for decades to come. 

Yet, for a film that tries to immerse itself in the subtlety of human thoughts and fears, they hammer the setting home with an  obvious, out of sync bit of dialogue that was jarringly out of the blue [my apologies if this isn't verbatim]:

"I can't believe how long its been. I started the program in 1968, and here it is, sixteen years later!"

Groan. 

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery

 

Glass Onion,  the second film in the Benoit Blanc "Knives Out" series,  is a destination mystery set on an island paradise during the pandemic. 

If you're watching it for the mystery, while it is well done, there are better tales out there to discover. But as a ensemble mystery/thriller with comedic undertones and, this one was a hoot. I greatly enjoyed it, and I eagerly await the next entry in the series. 

The Adam Project

So late last month I  watched the latest Ryan Reynolds Netflix film, The Adam Project. It's about a time traveler who goes back in time and works with his 12 year old self to prevent the death of his wife in the far future. 

It sounds, from that write-up, pretty heavy. 

Please. 

It's a goofy movie that doesn't even attempt to keep to a consistent take on time travel or its consequences, despite all the many times the characters openly whine about not changing history. And Ryan Reynolds once again, plays himself. His acting range has all the breadth of a flea's waistline. 

That said, I liked it. 

Why? Because Ryan Reynolds playing himself is a pretty interesting character, the 12 year old version of himself was a laugh out loud hit, and I dig time travel. 

So, assuming you already pay for a Netflix subscription, watch it. :)

Bullet Train

Lisa and I saw this movie at a theater in Beloit, an hour SW of Milwaukee. It was a non-Marcus theater, with brown leather recliners that had a built in seat warmer, a huge screen, and incredible sound. Far superior to the local Marcus product, in our opinion. 

As for the movie, Lisa was the one who wanted to see it, based largely on a recommendation from YaYa, but she didn't dig it and spent a good portion of the film surreptitiously checking her phone. That wasn't exactly a shock to me - she isn't one for violent movies, or even action movies in general. She'd been under the impression it was more of a comedy-action movie, rather than vice versa.

The movie had plenty of laughs (kudos to the comedy chops of Brad Pitt, by the way) but it had plenty of violence and action and gore too. It had a Guy Ritchie vibe to it, both in tone and dialogue. 

I loved it. I thought it was grand, even if it was so implausible as to make no sense, and I tip my hat to the entire cast, especially the before mentioned Pitt and Aaron Taylor-Johnson, aka Tangerine. 

If you don't mind a wee bit of blood squirting from eyeballs in a playful manner, go see this flick. 

It was grand. 

Grade: A

The Gray Man

Everyone I've heard speak about this movie trashes it,  but I think I'm the first person I know to actually WATCH it.  It isn't as bad as advertised.  Heck, I'll go so far as to say it was good by the standards of generic action movies.  

Was the CGI bad? In the case of the setting chosen for the climax, you betcha. That looked like they created it on my old Compaq All-in- One from 1996. But do you really care,  given all the action on screen at that moment? Nah.

And the action in Gray Man is impressive.  The Prague sequence alone was worth the proverbial cost of admission. 

Chris Evans was devilishly good in his turn as the field level bad guy,  even with his goofy mustache.  To my great chagrin, Ryan Gosling played a convincing operative, and unlike with most action heroes, his humor seemed genuine and actually,  you know … funny.

Now this is based on the book of the same name by Mark Greaney, and while significant details were added and subtracted to the story,  it retains the recognizable skeleton of the source material. Honestly,  it's better than the book, which I found tedious and which treated the character as an indestructible Superman. 

Don't get me wrong.  This isn't Shakespeare or even Die Hard. You can see the plot points coming from across town.  But it is entertaining, and the last time I checked,  that's the reason for movies in the first place.

Watch it. 

Everything Everywhere All at Once

 

We rented this movie after YaYa and Smiley independently recommended it, with one of them (I do not remember which) declaring it one of the most moving and powerful films they had seen. 

I enjoyed it, but I don't feel nearly as strongly about it. 

EEAAO is the story of Evelyn, a Chinese-American immigrant who lives in a cluttered apartment above the laundromat she owns with her husband, a man she secretly blames for the mundane life she lives. The business is under threat by the IRS, her daughter is barely on speaking terms with her, and her estranged father lives with them and does little beyond ratchet up her anxiety.  

So it is a bit surprising when Evelyn is told that she is but one of an infinite number of Evelyn's across the multiverse, and as it happens, the one Evelyn destined to stop an all-powerful entity threatening creation. 

The movie, if you can't tell, is part drama, part sci-fi, part action/kung-fu film, and part comedy. It's an unusual and  awkward mix of genres that works most of the time. When it clicks, you're delighted and left smiling at the screen. The few times it doesn't - well, it plops down with a thud. 

I think Michelle Yeoh and Stephanie Hsu were magnificent as the mother/daughter pair, and deserve award consideration. Beyond that, I don't think the movie lives up to the praise it's received. It's very good, but it isn't Citizen Kane. 

Perhaps, and I am quite serious here, the divide is purely generation. A large chunk of the film devotes itself to a nihilistic view of life, and the search to find a sliver of existence that by itself is enough to make you forget how small we are in the universe. 

That's a  subject that speaks far more to those just finding their footing in adulthood than it does someone who has seen the meaning of life reflected back in their children's eyes. 

Grade: B

Top Gun: Maverick

 

As a reward at the tail end of seventh grade, Mr. Eggner allowed our class to watch movies for most of the day. I brought in my well-worn VHS of The Alamo: 13 Days to Glory, expecting the class to love it as much as I did. Not surprisingly, it bombed. Over lunch my friend Erv went and got his copy of Top Gun and I sulked while he basked in the appreciation of our classmates.

 

Jerk.

 

But, after 35 years it was time to forgive, so I invited Erv to join me for a showing of Top Gun: Maverick.

 

I loved the movie. 

 

It wasn’t the action, although there was plenty of that, and every moment impressively done.

 

It wasn’t the nostalgia, although it certainly had that in bulk.

 

No, for me it was the maturity shown throughout the film. From Tom Cruise’s personal introduction before the movie to the final credits, this was a grown-ups movie. You aren’t looking at the Maverick of the first movie magically dropped into the future unchanged, as in many sequels; no, you’re looking at a grown man experiencing events from the eyes of a 50-something at the tail end of his career.

 

Maverick is still a Captain after 30 years – a ridiculous situation, explained away by his one-time nemesis/now Admiral, Iceman, intervening to save his career when he steps out of line. But from the start, we see that Maverick’s disobedience is no longer the bratty rebellious youth; right or wrong, he breaks the rules with deliberate thought, and then only to sacrifice himself for those around him.

 

Of course we see the pain of Goose’s death still shadows his life – so much for tossing Goose’s dog tag’s off the carrier, the moment of catharsis in the original – and that haunts the whole storyline. It also goes far in explaining why Maverick may have sabotaged his own career path; you’re not going to make Admiral if you are unwilling to send others into battle.

 

What really sold me on this film was the maturity displayed by Cruise himself. That personal message before the film really rang true; the man loves cinema. And in this film, unlike any other I remember, he is unafraid to show his age. I mean, Maverick is always going to be good looking; he’s Tom Cruise. But this was Tom Cruise with wrinkles and age lines, being taunted as an “old man” by other characters. He wasn’t afraid to show his height either; in scene after scene he’s clearly shorter than the men around him. I don’t recall ever seeing that before in a Cruise film.

 

Even the lovemaking scene was mature. There was a young boy sitting next to me, and when the scene began his Mom reached over and covered his eyes. She needn’t have bothered. As in Old Hollywood, there was the suggestion of lovemaking, not the act itself, and most of the scene was charmingly spent on pillow talk.

 

It just felt like Tom Cruise poured everything into his role. It felt . . . right.

Go see this in the theater! 

Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

Lu and I took advantage of $5 Tuesdays to check out Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness. 

I don't know how I feel about it. The visuals were impressive, and there were some great fight scenes and genuine horror - that scene with Black Bolt? Whoa.

But all in all I thought it was chaotic and pointless, like Marvel ordered "a Doctor Strange sequel with a side of Boo!" and they went with whatever storyline they could hang that description on. 

I don't think its a spoiler to mention that the Scarlet Witch is the main villain here, which is my main cry of bulls**t with the film. It isn't, as some writers have said, because it's a "sexist trope" to have a woman go mad with loss. Last time I checked, if that's a trope and not just a genuine human reaction, it's universal to characters of both sexes - see the Punisher, Death Wish, tons of westerns. 

No, my beef is that I thought we settled this dang issue at the end of WandaVision. Bringing her back to regurgitate the same reaction to loss seems . . . stupid. And a waste of a great character. Not to mention it renders the TV series pointless.

 I give this one a C.