Another Writer Here?

Between work/marriage/family/home/law school I don't have time for much, and I fear that Slapinions was feeling neglected. Sooooo . . . I have offered co-author duties to YaYa, who will fill in on *family* events as requested while leaving the occasional rant and review to me. She was awfully squeamish her first time out of the gate, but I've seen the kids writing: once she's past the jitters, she'll put out nice, readable copy for y'all. :)

Ivan R: Oh wow YaYa has a big responsibility now. You know what they say "With great power comes great responsibility" she's always been good on writing she would always write more than me during class time because I like writing too but no one in my family likes writing but me so I'm not sure if what I write is good or bad haha

Lisa: Ivan, that's a spiderman quote...awesome :)

Ivan R: Indeed it is I'm surprised you knew that:)

My First Day of Law School

My first day of law school is officially in the books :)

Two thumbs up! . . . Oh, sorry. - Fred

A-Rod's line

A-Rod yesterday: 2-4 with a walk, a home run, and 1 RBI.

650!!

Congrats to Alex Rodriguez on his 650th career home run!

I wrecked my thumb!

When I went to start the lawnmower this morning the starter cable broke loose and spent all its stored energy slamming into my hand. I broke my left thumb in multiple places, got three stitches and a tetanus shot. My thumbnail was black by the time I got back in the house, and there was some talk of removing it to get at a cut beneath it, but they let that be, to which I sincerely say "Whew." They still said the nail will probably fall off, which icks me out.  

How'd the kids take the injury? While I was stemming the bleeding Smiley asked me to burn him a CD,  Junie wanted to know if she could wear a pink batting helmet in lieu of a bike helmet, and YaYa argued with me before she'd loan me tape to wrap the gauze, then stressed that she wanted it back "the minute" I was done. Good Christians I'm raising LOL

On Miley Cyrus

I'm not sure what's up with people hating on Miley Cyrus' VMA performance. Sexually explicit? Sure. But hot, and entertaining, and the last time I checked she's over 18 and can can prance around in a tan bikini and twerk to her heart's content..  I think she 'wins' for most memorable act of this year's show. As to the 30 second N'SYNC reunion - why bother? I've had yawns that have lasted longer. I rate that as a fail.

update: Ack. I must be growing more tolerant in my middle age. It's one thing for people on FB to dislike Cyrus' performance and give their two cents on their page - that's fine - but the string of condescending/derogatory/insulting/virulently hateful comments that have been left on public FB accounts (news feeds, etc)  is nauseating.

This earns your ire? Not violence in Chicago, the collapse of Detroit, or the working poor; no, a *partially clad woman* is a your bellwether of the End Times.

Worst of all are the comments from  men I know would be happy to insult her and call her a slut -- and then sleep with her and go home to their wife. Enjoy your hypocrisy America.

She's laughing all the way to the bank! - Lisa

My Draft

In the middle of my fantasy football draft. About as much fun as . . . well, not much fun at all. A social obligation necessary to keep your man card in 2013, but I've no love for it.

My Draft Results - ignore Pitta, who's out for the year. We have to drop one player and leave the slot open for the expansion draft, so he's it for me. 

Peyton Manning Den - QB New Player Note

Thu 7:30 pm vs Bal 

306.15 92% 400 183 4659 37 11 2 2 6 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 2

 

Mike Williams TB - WR New Player Note

Sun 12:00 pm @ NYJ 

176.48 42% 1 0 28 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 63 996 9 3 0 0 0

 

Sidney Rice Sea - WR Player Note

Sun 12:00 pm @ Car 

132.68 14% 1 1 25 0 0 0 0 6 0 0 50 748 7 1 0 0 0

 

Victor Cruz NYG - WR Player Note

Sun 7:30 pm @ Dal 

194.70 94% 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 86 1092 10 2 0 0 0

 

Maurice Jones-Drew Jac - RB New Player Note

Sun 12:00 pm vs KC 

67.50 88% 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 414 1 1 14 86 1 0 0 0 0

 

BenJarvus Green-Ellis Cin - RB New Player Note

Sun 12:00 pm @ Chi 

155.30 22% 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1094 6 0 22 104 0 0 0 0 2

 

Dennis Pitta Bal - TE No new player Notes

Thu 7:30 pm @ Den 

126.15 6% 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 61 669 7 1 0 0 0

 

Shonn Greene Ten - RB New Player Note

Sun 12:00 pm @ Pit 

171.15 4% 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1063 8 0 19 151 0 0 0 0 1

 

Philip Rivers SD - QB New Player Note

Mon 9:20 pm vs Hou 

191.55 5% 338 189 3606 26 15 2 2 40 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 7

 

Rob Gronkowski NE - TE New Player Note

Sun 12:00 pm @ Buf 

155.75 50% 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 55 790 11 0 0 0 1

 

Darrius Heyward-Bey Ind - WR New Player Note

Sun 12:00 pm vs Oak 

106.45 3% 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 16 0 0 41 606 5 2 0 0 0

 

Zach Sudfeld NE - TE Player Note

Sun 12:00 pm @ Buf 

0.00 22% - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

    Fantasy Field Goals Made Field Goals Missed PAT

Edit Kickers Fan Pts % Start 0-19 20-29 30-39 40-49 50+ 0-19 20-29 30-39 40-49 50+ Made Miss

 

David Akers Det - K No new player Notes

Sun 12:00 pm vs Min 

135.50 59% 1 8 11 7 2 0 1 2 6 4 44 0

 

Shayne Graham Cle - K No new player Notes

Sun 12:00 pm vs Mia 

152.00 11% 1 8 11 7 4 0 0 0 2 5 45 0

    Fantasy Tackles Turnovers TD Miscellaneous Ret

Edit Defense/Special Teams Fan Pts % Start Pts Allow Sack Safe TFL Int Fum

Rec TD Blk

Kick 4 Dwn

Stops 3 And

Outs TD

 

Denver Den - DEF No new player Notes

Thu 7:30 pm vs Bal 

324.75 87% 275 52.0 2 83 16 8 6 1 11 60 2

 

San Diego SD - DEF No new player Notes

Mon 9:20 pm vs Hou

School Hair

A great benefit to the kids going to public school this year: Lisa just dyed Junie and LuLu's hair blue - well, blue *streaked* and YaYa has resurrected the bleached highlights that soooooo bothered her principal last year. And in a single rummage sale shop we scored Smiley a school years worth of high end shirts . . . for $10 (50 cents a pop). Boom!

they are...I need to post pic of LuLu's ....it's brown, then switches to blond, light turquoise, dark turquoise...that's what she wanted and I managed to come pretty close. She was impressed :) - Lisa

Braun's Botched Apology

Braun's apology sucked. What a standard issue PR pro written piece that STILL made him sound like a dick. He should have spoke the truth: "Yeah, I used PED's. I had a big contract, and I didn't want to under-perform and screw over my teammates or piss off the fans - guess I didn't do that last part right after all. Still, you got your money's worth watching me right? And sure, I through that urine collector under the bus, but you know how it is. You get caught doing wrong, your first instinct isn't to come clean, it's to lie and dodge the bullet. That's the part I really do feel bad about. I shouldn't have done that to the guy, but OTOH he still violated procedure and deserved to get canned. Still, my bad"

COMMENTER: I agree, I find his apology "empty", but, A-Rod is in the same boat as Braun, no denying it!

ME: Nonsense - Braun has intentionally and maliciously destroyed a man's career by, among other things, using Braun's own religion as a lever to accuse him of anti-Semitism. There's nothing in Alex's tale that is as deliberately douchey. Besides, Braun wasn't any good as a 3rd baseman while A-Rod is.

Alex is vilified because a) he signed a huge contract for big $, and if there's one thing American's secretly despise its a true Horatio Alger story b) he had the temerity to earn that money while being the the best player on the planet (not named Bonds) for a team that sucked (TX) c) he joined the Yankees d) among Yankee fans, he is not considered a 'true' Yankee because he was not around for Torre's run nor did he come up through their system e) he cheated on his wife, which, as you know, no other ballplayer has EVER done.

Junie Cracks an Insult

Junie's version of a wicked insult: "Oh yeah? You can't see in the dahk, cuz youuuuuu nevah eat carrots!"

In Case you Missed it . . .

In case you haven't been paying attention: with A-Rod back on the field the Yanks have surged. They've won 5 straight and are now only 3.5 games out of a wild card spot. This, despite being declared dead in the water pre-Arod. Rodriguez, btw, was 0-3 with a walk, a stolen base, and a run scored yesterday

I should also mention that they've won 11 of 14 since his return. A-Rod I bow to thee!

Gulp

Less than 90 minutes until Marquette orientation. Rattler's in my stomach . . . .

Student loans make it possible to anyone. When there's a will there's a way. It's a huge financial risk....but sometimes risk pays off. - Lisa

update: 

Orientation at Marquette went fine. It was five hours long and featured two one hour class sessions, despite, you know, school not actually starting until next week :) 

The program is big on the Socratic method, which is a bit of an adjustment, but once I was called on and grilled for four or five minutes the nerves passed. I'm one of only 18 students in the part-time program and it looks like we'll be stuck with one another for years, so for good or bad we're bound to become a tight knit bunch. 

By coincidence my seat was next to someone I'd met and chatted with at the LSAT. We both congratulated each other on making the cut. Small world. 

This is just the beginning of the process, and as we all know (and some people may desire) this may all wind up a disaster. 

But, *IF* this was some dorky TV movie, and the start of law school was the denouement of a standard underdog story, it would have ended on the very view I saw driving home via 794: The moon, full and bright against a pitch black sky, surrounded by blossoming fireworks as it cast a single bar of light over the still waters of the lake. 

I almost laughed out loud at the cheesiness of it. :)

Quote

Carlos Harmon sez: Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is that you're ignorant and make bad decisions.

Paul Poberzny

RIP EAA founder Paul Poberzny, age 91

Same Love

I don't like the song "Same Love" by  Macklemore. It's got nothing to do with its stance on gay marriage,  I just don't think it's a very good song. Aside from the guest vocals by Mary Lambert there's nothing to it aside from a preachy monologue. What bothers me the most is that *I'm not allowed to dislike it* without running the risk of being labelled a bigot. This isn't anti-PC paranoia, someone actually suggested the two were equated, and Lisa has asked me not to mention my thoughts on the song, a request I reject firmly/respectfully as a ridiculous concession to group think. People, it's a pop song without a hook! If the subject was more conventional you'd have booed it off the radio in the first week.

The 30th Grandpa's Day

Last Saturday was the 30th anniversary of a road trip I took with my Grandfather, a trip that took place less than three weeks before his death. It was, and remains, one of the best days of my life. Lisa and I had planned on going up north to a corn roast to mark the day, but we cxl'd that as punishment for the kids behaviour on the way to IKEA earlier in the week. Instead, it was a quiet day at home. Still, after Mass, just as twilight was marking the sky, I took the kids to visit his grave. RIP Grandpa.

I wish I could have this [known this]  person who had such a profound effect on your life. - Tre

Batting Cages

Took Team Slap to the batting cages yesterday. Yeah, the kids had fun, bonded, learned stuff, blah blah. Anyway, the important bit: on a lark I stepped into the 70 MPH cage and, to the amazement of one and all, connected on 18 of 24 pitches - a total that included some nasty rockets. It may well be the single most athletic accomplishment of my life.

Foul tips don't count, my friend. ;-)  Tre

Elmore Leonard

RIP Elmore Leonard, age 87

At the Batting Cages with Junie

What a Game

GREAT Yankees-Red Sox game tonight. A-Rod was drilled intentionally in the 2nd, a juvenile act that was roundly cheered by the classless Boston fans. In his next at bat Alex drove in a run, and when he led off the 6th with the Yankees down three he pounded a tape-measure shot to right center. The joy on his face was wonderful, and when he got to home plate he stopped, pointed his fingers to the sky ala David Ortiz, and just let the boos wash over him. F'ing brilliant! The homer started a rally that led to a Yankees win. Rodriguez's final line: 3-4 with a home run, two runs scored, a HBP, and two RBI's. A-Rod, I bow to thee!

Aside from seeing A-Rod trample the disgusting Red Sox, my day did slightly improve when I went out for some exercise with the kids. I let Parker and Olivia ride their bikes while Lauren and I set out on foot. It was the first real test of my knee in a week, and I made it about half a mile before the pain reared up and I tapped out rather than injure it further. Still, progress. Lisa then gave me a ride to the store where PD/OJ met me with their bikes. Afterwards I let them bike home, with permission to ride around the perimeter of the park first. Then stretched this to a 90 minute romp and returned after dark, but WTH - at least they got in a good workout. :)

It is just about impossible to gauge how much fan-love I have for Alex Rodriguez. 

A Waste

So far a wasted day off . . . and nothing makes me more bitter

Yikes

Idiocy

Ken Rosenthal:

"But perhaps the best way for him [Mark McGwire] to enhance his [HOF] candidacy would be to say the words that so many wanted to hear when he testified before Congress on March 17, 2005:

"Yes, I used steroids. And I'm sorry."

[McGwire: "I used steroids during my playing career and I apologize... I wish I had never touched steroids. It was foolish and it was a mistake. I truly apologize... I shouldn't have done it and for that I'm truly sorry."]

Ken Rosenthal in December 2012:

"Mark McGwire has admitted using PEDs. It’s reasonable to conclude that without the drugs, he would not have produced the same power numbers, the numbers that are the essence of his candidacy. Thus, I do not vote for him."

Well, Ken DID say "perhaps.

- Gonfalon Bubble on BTF

My, that was a purty little home run A-Rod hit yesterday. Now 12 shy of Mays.

Wrapping up the State Fair

It was a great State Fair, and I greatly enjoyed the eleven days I spent with the kids in Lisa's absence. 

My biggest pet peeve from these weeks: people who asked me if I was "ok" or "how was I holding up". Jeezus people, I made the kids, I should be able to handle two weeks with them. What an antiquated and sexist question.

I'm actually grateful for the time, as I think it proved to them that Dad can take care of business at home and that Mom is more than "just a" Mom. I wish that Lisa had been able to pursue a similar opportunity in MN, but there's just not enough of a support system here to ride out a 2nd two week spell with both of us working. On Sunday I got the opportunity to spend the evening at the fair, and at close helped take apart Lisa's booth and stack it on a pallet - work that's definitely harder than my real job!